I'm over this crap :/

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by xoCherie, May 17, 2012.

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  1. xoCherie

    xoCherie Well-Known Member

    Ugh I don't know where to start. So this will just be as my thoughts come to me okay? Sweet. This starts off as a rant, but it's an important one that sums everything up that I need help with. Before I break.

    Basically this chick who was supposed to be my friend (lets call her S) has gone around course on Monday spreading malicious lies and rumors about me, it all flared up when she posted our private messages onto her Facebook account and tumblr, and didn't seem to care what she was doing ie saying "what's the big deal everyone lies once in their lives :L" and then refusing to go to course anymore "until all this drama has been sorted out." So on Tuesday I told the tutor that she was refusing to come to course, and I tried to say what was happening to make her feel like it, but I got brushed aside entirely. Later in the day, the tutor (lets call her A) tapped on my shoulder and asked for me to come with her. She led me to another tutor's room, where that tutor (let's call him G) and S were already sitting waiting for me and A. I take a seat, thinking they'll want my side of the story. Wrong. The whole "mediation" as they called it, was G and A saying S was accusing me of threatening her via tumblr (someone had messaged her saying "Cheries gunna stab u" which is just...no. If I have beef, I don't go anon, I say it to your face) and that "the police can trace the IP address and find out where it came from" and more crap like that. I didn't get to say anything until the end, where A noticed my jaw was clenched and asked me if I wanted to say anything. I just said how I thought they were avoiding the problem entirely and just shoving it under the carpet without letting me have any say anything, at that G asked what I thought the problem was, and the first thing that came to my mind was how S had gone around telling people that I self harm, and thought it was "okay". She instantly cut me off and was saying how my friend had asked her (lies, I talked to said friend) about this red writing that was on my arm (I had worthless bitch written because I honestly felt like one) that looked like scratches or cuts (he wasn't wearing his glasses when he saw it) and any other time after that when I was trying to talk she would cut me off, and A and G just let her.

    Now she's given my number out, and I know it was her because the message starts with "hey Cherie it's your boyfriend" - I don't have a fucking boyfriend! - and she's the only person out of the ten people on my phone that I've fought with recently, and the whole thing is enough to trigger me. The whole message is this; "hey Cherie it's your boyfriend. Uhm, are you still up for that fuck? Cause I'm sweet for Monday or Tuesday. I'm so keen for this root. I'll pop round, just give me a call." which is coming across as not only has she given my number out, but my address as well.
    I went to the police about the phone call and they said they can't do anything because it was a private number, so to go to my phone provider to get the number blocked. My phone provider wont do anything because they need police permission to access the files, and if I block one number, she'll just give it out to other people.

    I'm so close to a) quitting my course, b) punching S into the wall, or c) self harming over this. All of those are not the best of ideas but I don't know what to do. She's made it impossible for me to do anything. She's playing with me and I'm so so so close to just snapping and wailing into her with everything I've got. I can't handle this.
    I don't know what to do.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 17, 2012
  2. yep

    yep Well-Known Member

    Hi Cherie
    At the time you get this, this reply may reach you at a different mood or circumstances than the ones you have described above so basically I would like to ask you some questions and make some comments for you to think about. I don't expect reply this is just for you:
    1. The way you present your story, it is like you life is in chaos now though your description is only about this issue with a particular person.
    2. What sort of help are you getting from others, not to say you are right or wrong but to get you through this crissis?
    3. How do you make sure you keep safe from suicide and harming yourself?
    4. You are not alone, use others you trust by letting them know you need their support. They are likely to help you but you need to ask for help. You are not alone.
  3. xoCherie

    xoCherie Well-Known Member

    O1. It's not in chaos, it's mainly this one event that's thrown me off
    O2. None really. I've got my youth outreach worker helping me with it but the next appointment isn't until Tuesday. My house mate just said to ignore S but it's hard when she's being buddy buddy with everyone I even talked to once at course, and making a point of being really loud and obnoxious in class.
    O3. Making myself stay around people, like my house mates. It helps that I haven't got any razors, but that'll change because I need to buy some to shave since mine are all dull
    O4. S was the one person I thought I could trust :/
  4. xoCherie

    xoCherie Well-Known Member

    Honestly I would really love help on this still. Because it hasn't stopped? She's gotten her friends and cousin to message me on Facebook threatening me
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