I'm pathetic

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by lonelymortal, May 26, 2009.

  1. lonelymortal

    lonelymortal Well-Known Member

    I'd rather end up in jail for something crazy than spend one day sober. I'm NEVER going to be able to face 24 hours sober.. ugh it's ridiculous. I hate the taste of beer but I sit in front of my computer drinking until I feel tired and go to sleep for a few hours. I wish I could be nice and high right now.. somehow drinking just doesn't do it for me in the same way
    Anyways i'm kind of drunk right now ahahaa.. i'm a fuck up
     
  2. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    First of all you're not a fuck up. People always put themselves down on this forum but just the simple fact that they're sharing makes them worthy of help and not a fuck up, or any of the other put downs people give themselves.
    Have you ever tried getting help for this like through NA or AA?
     
  3. lonelymortal

    lonelymortal Well-Known Member

    I've never tried getting help, I feel like if I have to sober up and go to NA/AA i'll be so depressed i'll barely be able to get myself out of bed to eat. I think of myself as a fuckup because other people my age are in class right now learning, or meeting some nice girl or something. I'm at home like always up to no good. I guess I posted to warn people not to be like me. My stomach hurts and i'm tired all the time. I have mood swings all the time. I barely have the energy to talk in real life. Other than addiction i've been struggling with depression for years. Most of the time i'm too depressed to check the forum/respond to posts and stuff. Anyways that's about all I can say, thanks for the post
     
  4. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    You do not have to sober up to go to NA or AA. You can go there high. What they tell you is that if you've used that day to talk to someone at the break. You know what the worst that could happen is? That you get a hug! NA is very loving, from my experience. One time I went, and a newcomer started crying during the meeting. It's definitely worth giving a chance.

    As far as depression goes, I understand. I'm not motivated to do much of anything but I am a bit of an internet addict. I'm actually a little high right now. I haven't been going to meetings. I have to start soon because I want to be able to get out and get a job. I'm not doing anything either. No job, no school, no car, no phone! :hug: