I dont know if this is in the right section so bare with me. Im feeling so down, ive got an appointment with the mental health ppl at one of my local hospitals at 1420 wens 20/04, my doc refered me as urgent. I want to die and I dont want to go in case that im locked up, im scared of that and of life in genral, but im scared that if I dont go that they will send the police round my house and lock me up, Ive got to go and see a client at 4am and I know they like very rough hard sex and I know it will make me feel a lot worce which i dont want, but if i dont go I cant afford to get to the hospital, ive got no-one to take me, I think its one of those Catch 22 things! The only way i can see out of it is to run away or kill myself (which wouldnt be to hard in my current state). I dont really have the energy to run away but killing myself wouldnt be that hard. I just dont know what to do.