I'm scared

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by dontknowme57, Jun 1, 2007.

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  1. dontknowme57

    dontknowme57 New Member

    I have never done this before. I've been depressed since as long as I can remember, 12 or 13 years old. I know that's not all that long, I used to work with kids who were depressed as young as 4 or 5 years old. But I have lately felt more and more scared in my surroundings and uneasy and sad about how my family treats me (I am early 20s, live at home with mum, dad, and sister, and in university).

    Anyway, my story is long and stupid. The bottom line is that I've been depressed and scared for many years, my parents have told me that they will not allow me to get help from a therapist (they don't think I need it). I usually just injure myself, but my sister is buying a gun for protection that should be here at the end of the month. I have a plan in my mind for killing myself with this weapon when it is available. The only person I told about this was my boyfriend this afternoon. He cried but couldn't really tell me anything about why I ought to stay alive, and I'm running out of reasons in my own head. I don't know what else to say. I guess I just have never felt that mine is a life worth saving. That's probably true.
  2. danni

    danni Chat Buddy

    hun you help kids with this kinda stuff making there today brighter, making them seeing the next day. Your a human being and everyone has a life worth saving that the true. Hey hon if u want to talk you can pm me and i do mah best to help you.
  3. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    If the kids you work with were to divulge to you what you did here, what woul you tell them? The answer should be the same. I highly doubt you would tell the to pick up te gun and use it. You woul make sure it is in a safe place and not easily accessed. Do you need it around for protection? Does your sister know your feelings. Maybe she can put it is a secure place. Build in safety measures so it isn't easily accessible on a whim. You are in your early 20's. You no longer need your parents permission to seek medical helpDon't let them dictate to you what you need. Only you can determine that.Do what is the best opton for you. Suicide is notincluded in that equation. You o have velue. You work with the children so perhaps they won't have to face this all into adulthood. You help them to become a better part of our future. That shows both value and purpose.
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