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I'm scared

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For some time now i have been scared of guys when they come near me, if a guy touches me or tries to kiss me i shake, cry, zone out and get flashbacks, i physically can't handle it. When my grandad tried to molest me, i was still okay with guys infact it got me starting to believe that guys only like you for sex so i'd like it if a guy was trying to sleep with me but now it's different. Guys have not taken no for an answer sevreal times, my friends try to sleep with me, guys only talk to me for that, i've lost mates because of it. Then not long a go a guy tried to get me in his car and the other day, someone tried to kiss me and was being really pervy, i thought he was gonna rape me. I'm scared to be near a guy i don't know and to walk near them in public, what do i do? Does someone else have this problem?


Well-Known Member
I've been like that too for a while, but not quite at the lenghts you tell us.
What I would do if I were you: keep pepper spray in my purse/pocket, date guys interested more in what's in my mind. Clear your head so you can differenciate them, I can't think that all of them are thinking just on how to sleep with you.
I think I'm not supposed to say this but... this is what I think when I'm
pissed off about it: I can use them too. :mhmm:

and pepper spray for your fear and for jerks

I don't know... If you ever need to talk about it you can PM me anytime


Well-Known Member
I think some guys are just after one thing but most are not, they do desire sex but only with someone they feel connected to.

Take precautions to always be safe, I think that is just good sense and if you date, then make it clear beforehand that there will be no physicality until you decide the time is right.
I am a guy and I was sexually abused by my dad and take it from me I don't trust many people and when any one try's to get close to me now I just walk away, OK that makes me a bit of a loaner but I prefer to be allow then hurt again.

I even walk away from the only person I let get close in a long time I loved here to bits but could not handle any physical contact any more.
I understand how you are all feeling, and as sick as it sounds, it's nice to know I'm not alone. Not nice to know that others have been abused, but nice to know that I'm not the only one scared of contact. I haven't let my husband touch me in a couple of months. He's more understanding about this point than he should be, and that makes it a bit easier I suppose. But I'm fighting with myself right now about letting this go, it's so hard to love someone so much, but cringe and cry when he touches me. It's not him I fear, but I still just can't.
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