Im Scaring Myself

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Dubz, Feb 9, 2007.

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  1. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    Ive never been so close ... I just did something thats really scared me ... I just went and tested out a rope to see if it was strong enough ... I've never done that before ... I just pulled it to see how much weight it could take ... where i put it wouldn't hold much ... so i think im gonna find another place ... I wanna OD but i can't ... all the times i've done it before and mentally affected me ... just the thought of taking them make me feel sick ... make me wanna throw up ... im so close ... i can feel what im gonna do ... I love you all but i cant take this anymore ... i just can't ... I need to disappear ... Im sorry ... I really am sorry to all of you ... if you figure out who this is then i truely am sorry to you .. . a few people in particular.
     
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Hold on hun, things may seem bad right now this second; but please HOLD ON!!!

    Can you talk about whats happening, whats brought you to this point?

    PM me anytime and maybe try coming into chat. My MSN is in my profile too.
     
  3. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    How can i hold on when i have something to hang myself right next to me ... I tried to leave here ... tried to disappear ... i wanna so badly ... so fucking badly ... i've never felt this close ... ever ... i wanna test out new places ... see if it can hold the weight ... i need to ... Its scary ... I cant talk to you ... I just can't

    :cry:
     
  4. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    I know sometimes talking is really hard, but think what the alternative is!!!
    Hang in there, throw away the rope...make tea/coffee whatever. PM me whatever it takes to make you safe.
     
  5. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    Trust me ... i know why i can't talk to you ... or anyone else ... Im sorry
     
  6. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Ok if you can't talk to me, but please find someone you can talk to.
     
  7. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    I can't talk to anyone ... not anymore ... i put this happy mask up for people ... nothing matters now ... i cant do this anymore ... i cant
     
  8. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
     
  9. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    Why cant i just do it ... i wanted ... where i put it ... it broke ... i dont want people angry at me ... or anyone else ... its no ones fault but my own ... i will allways blame myself for everything ... I cant take any more shit ... i feel empty ... i wanna so badly ... i think tonight it will get alot worse than it is right now ... best if i wasnt around then ... then you cant talk to me like you did

    :cry:
     
  10. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    Reply to my text! :sad:



    :hug:
     
  11. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    Hun this aint who you think this is
     
  12. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    :eek:hmy: it's you???? :unsure: :eek:hmy: :cry:
     
  13. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    Who??? :unsure:
     
  14. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

  15. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    Sorry :cry:
     
  16. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    I love ya hun.. please don't do this. :cry:


    :hug:
     
  17. Dubz

    Dubz Guest

    I love you too ... im sorry ... i really am ... i dont wanna hurt any of you but i cant take my life any more ... i feel empty ... nothing to live for
     
  18. Mya

    Mya Well-Known Member

    I dont know you but i see that people here really care about you...and you sound like a really nice person...please dont do this....just think about all you will leave behind like friends and siblings...im sure there are people that care about you...i dont even know you and i care about you....email me if you need to talk poisonous.skittles@gmail.com
     
  19. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    There's a lot to live for you just can't see it now because you're ill hun :hug:
     
  20. ybt

    ybt Guest

    you know, you're forgetting one crucial thing. and before i say that, remember that this isn't me being angry with you, it's me trying to save your life.

    we're all in the same situation you are. we understand perfectly what you're going through. just please hang on. it gets better
     
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