I'm Shocked

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by care4cats, Jan 6, 2008.

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  1. care4cats

    care4cats Member

    Hello Everyone!

    I came here because I have been depressed for the last 4 yrs. I am shocked that the majority of people on here are so young! The young ones still have time to change their lives around.

    Be strong and pull yourself up. You have to have at least one thing positive, and that one thing is the gift of life.

    I am going to be 46. Most of my life was a living hell. I'm still here.
    I don't want to hurt the people in my life, and thats my children. They keep me going.

    Even though I am depressed I take a look at the situation. Remember there is always some one worse off than you. Think about the little children suffering from cancer, the children starving. How do you think they feel??
  2. worlds edge

    worlds edge Well-Known Member

    You don't sound particularly depressed.

    Funny, that bromide seems as crap to me at 43 as it did at 17.

    Wow, never heard that one before.

    If life is a "gift," where's the line for exchanges and returns? This life doesn't fit right, and I'm decidedly unenthusiastic about the style. Though I seem to have misplaced the receipt somewhere... :dry:

    You've made your choice, and you appear happy with it. Why do you think what you've decided is any sense applicable to anyone else?

    Well, yes. I spend a great deal of time taking a look at my "situation." And?

    I don't know how they feel, in all honesty. And how the heck do you know how you know how they feel? And, honestly, though I'm no fan of pain, why should I consider someone contemplating their own imminent demise to be worse off than I am? Your little anecdote seems to be the point you're trying to prove, offered up as a reason.
  3. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    It really pisses me off how you kinda people tell "young" people to pull their heads in! you have no right. You dont know me nor other young people. Im a teenager, yet I feel so old. I'm probably more mature than most 30 yr olds. What do you put it down to, "life experiences"? We;; I've had enough of them already. So you have no right to generalise and say silly things. Be more considerate next time please!
    Why dont you just tell us to think about the people in poor parts of Africa. I can't handle people like you. you are rude and inconsiderate of everyone else. I suppse you think mental illness isnt true also?
  4. ithuriel

    ithuriel Well-Known Member

    hi , care4cats :)
    thats partially what kept me hanging around life too , my mum always used to say there is someone worse off.
    making someone feel guilty who is already suicidal is'nt the best thing i guess because its another negative feeling.
    fortunately i'm 39 so if i bow out , and i am still getting those thoughts and the odd urge even with my pills , i'm old anyway.
    to the youngsters here i can only say that you really are just starting your life.
    your childhood years may be coming to a close but your adult life is yet to begin and you have so much freedom and choice and life may actually give you a break and treat you better.
    my childhood sucked bigtime , it was the worst time of my life.
    at the time it felt normal and that was how life was supposed to be.
    inspite of all the hardships since i've enjoyed my adult life far more.
    i'm rambling again so i'm going to stop before i send someone to sleep:eek:hmy:
  5. astella

    astella Well-Known Member

    So because someone is suffering more than I am I shouldn't kill myself? Sure, my life might be better than theirs, but what has that got to do with anything? You might as well tell children who are starving that there are people who are being tortured on a daily basis, so they shouldn't consider killing themselves. Just because someone is in a worse position than I am doesn't mean I'm not justified in taking my own life.

    Edit: That said, I'm sixteen and I don't appreciate ageism either. Sorry to tell you, but my age does not affect my ability to reason. Being young doesn't magically make me wrong and you right.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 6, 2008
  6. Daze&Confused

    Daze&Confused Antiquitie's Friend

    Nobody is too young or too old to feel lost. 15 or 50 the pain is still the same.

    Life is a battle,where's my white flag.
  7. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    Right so because we "have our lives ahead of us" we shouldnt be depressed? isnt that a reason to be depressed. So you have more years than be, why cant you and the OP start a new life? this is so stupid.
  8. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

  9. ithuriel

    ithuriel Well-Known Member

    thats not what i was saying.
    i never said you should not feel depressed.
    i'm just trying to give advice the best i can , if that makes you angry then i'm sorry.
  10. Labrynth

    Labrynth Active Member

    I'm not sure its making people feel angry exactly....I just think it comes across as very patronising. If the OP was truly depressed they would realise how difficult and impossible it feels to try to "pull yourself up" or whatever the term used was. Its just like anything, telling people they are too young to know, had no life experience "oh you wait until youre my age if you think its bad now". Its infuriatingly patronising to be told that. I am 28.....am I considdered old enough to feel depressed?? I didnt realise there was an age limit......
  11. Mortem

    Mortem Well-Known Member

    Well, there's always someone worse off... the starving ethiopian, or the indian ship dismantler worker who, maybe right now right now, gets his arm and leg cut off by a falling 10 ton steel sheet. Or whoever whereever. There are people going through the most extreme and unfortunate events and accidents but who still just keeps on struggling, who have such an immense survival instinct. I admire those people. I also admire those who can live for their material desires or those who find an obsession to live for, a genuine interest - may it be drawing, tennis, travelling or anything. Not to mention those blessed with ignorance. Anyone who knows the art of enjoying nothingness. Some have it, some not. Regardless of age.

    Someone who's young has more time to turn his life around? Yeah, I guess there's some logic to that. At the same time someone who's young haven't had the same time to make impact on people, or perhaps gain reponsibilities that "ties you down" such as children. So in that sense it can possibly be better to go earlier. Bit of a gamble I suppose.

    Sorry for being negative. I do realize you placed this post with good intentions :cool:
  12. ithuriel

    ithuriel Well-Known Member

    thats not what i was saying though.
    i guess i'm not the best at expressing myself at the moment , maybe i should stop posting.
    what i was trying to say is that life can get better.
    i never said anything about what age a person can be depressed at , i've been there:sad: standing in the rain at the back of the garden when i was ten
    wondering if i was a freak and back then there was no net , nobody i could speak to. we did'nt have a phone and i rarely got any pocket money to ring anyone.if i told my dad he would have just made fun of me and my mum was the same.
    i guess what i was trying to get across is that there can be hope , something better. where i stand though there just seems like less because i have less years remaining to me , its just the way i'm feeling at present.
  13. Labrynth

    Labrynth Active Member

    I know you wasnt trying to be condescending Ituriel. You shouldnt stop posting, I was just trying to say that when you are told that you are too young to be depressed, pull yourself up, its just as bad as nobody listening to you. Its like nobody is taking you seriously because youre young. That can make people feel a lot worse and a lot more alone. Nobody wants to feel depressed.
  14. zzz

    zzz Well-Known Member

    Hi Mortem, you’ve hit on a very interesting point.

    Even a starving women struggling to support her children in a barren, God-forsaken environment can find the strength to walk miles to the neighbouring village every day in order to pick up a few grains of rice off the floor.

    And here we are, with our Internet connections and mobile phones and some of us haven’t even got the strength to get out of bed.

    So what is going on?

    Well, thought is a subtle power; it’s not something physical. We are each a living energy. And we have lost power through over-engrossing in matter. We lack the strength to fulfill our responsibilities and that results in suffering.

    But there is hope. I’ve never read the bible but I believe there is a passage that says that the meek shall inherit the earth. This is true because the souls who have the largest capacity have had the longest journey and are the first to run out of power and become tired.

    That’s why the souls struggling on this forum are interesting and have a real depth to them whilst the people currently holding power in the world are rather dull and shallow. This is why we can see what’s wrong with the world and they can’t.

    So try and keep going everybody until your last physical breath. Trust me, I know how hard it is but we can do it The law is that nothing will come to you that you can’t handle, though it often doesn’t feel like it.

    Best wishes from zzz.

    Ps. One way to get a little power back is to be nice to people. What does it really matter if what they say is right or wrong? Everyone is doing his or her best. Look deep into your own heart and you will know that this is true.
  15. care4cats

    care4cats Member

    WOW! I didn't mean to upset anyone. I just think it's awful how you are mostly young adults. My son tried killing himself. Several times. He was hospitalized and on meds. Today he is absolutely happy that he didn't actually die. He has a great life now. I'm not telling anyone how they should feel. I don't like hearing young adults talking suicide. I have seen it. And believe it or not I have helped several teens.

    Hope You all try to stay strong.
  16. care4cats

    care4cats Member

    I have had experience in starving and pain. I know that the children with cancer and the children that are starving are not feeling too good. I don't sound depressed. Thats a good one. How do you know if I'm depressed or NOT?
  17. jonstark

    jonstark Well-Known Member

    The kids in Africa are fine. I saw this documentary about them, "The Gods Must Be Crazy", and they looked very happy.
  18. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    I need to state some thing's on here I'm 32 year's of age have been suffering from depression,Ocd and Bdd for year's now.To me it doesn't matter how young or old you're if you suffer from depression obviously there is a problem,next of all that ignorant comment like do this or that and you will feel better do these people seriously think if we could fix our depression we wouldn't?

    It's like we love feeling the way we do,yes I know people have it very bad in certain part's of the world but just because I have this and that doesn't mean I can snap out of the way I feel like that.The stigma of mental illness is a shocking thing and it appear's because if you don't have Cancer,Lieukemia or a noticeable Physical illness then you appear to be a ok.

    I see many young people on here struggling and they mention suicide so often,obviously they're hurting so bad.Also I know they're trying because being depressed you go through each day is such a struggle and a battle in itself.I also must say people who don't suffer from a mental illness for e.g and try to pass it off as nothing or the sufferer is plain lazy etc,can consider themselve's damn lucky they aren't in such a position.

    I can't help but feeling myself that the opening post of this thread was rather unfair and offensive in a way,why?because I know everyone on here is trying and just because they're young doesn't mean they can keep saying to themselve's I have the rest of my life ahead of me I should be feeling better and bang it's all changed.

    It's quite simple because if such saying's as "Life's too short" "You only live once" etc really worked unlike they do for a matter of seconds or minutes we wouldn't have people with such condition's and suffering.Such saying's or statements in my opinion are easier for someone who is quite mentally healthy or who may've beaten a difficult time of depression or cancer or any such illness.

    I'm sick of it when someone say people have it worse off than you,this clearly indicates ignorance and total lack of understanding.It clearly prove's how people have no idea and how each person's suffering shouldn't be compared to each other.Simply because one person has Cancer doesn't mean they're worse of than a person who has severe depression,It may be seen as the sufferer of depression doesn't have a terminal illness but they're battling everyday so it's like a terminal illness in a way.Having your life dictated in such a way by trying to deal with such condition's is no easy feat,it affect's you in every way it can.You just don't go on a holiday and leave the illnesse's at home you wear them everyday.

    I was trying to refrain to be honest on psoting in this thread but I really needed to state some much needed points not that any doesn't know anyway.To everyone who is suffering I just wanted to say I know you're trying and how rotten it feels don't ever feel you aren't doing enough because you feel mentally exhausted and are doing it so tough.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 7, 2008
  19. Reki

    Reki Well-Known Member

    I don't think care4cats was intenting to offend or patronise anyone with what he/she said. A few people might do well to be quiet and think for a few minutes about what it is he/she is saying before deciding he/she was wrong and needs an immediate reprimand for what was quite obviously an attempt to be positive.
  20. jonstark

    jonstark Well-Known Member

    Attempting to be positive is no excuse.
    Depressed people are not stupid people. If one could just think, damn, there are people worse off than me, wtf, and then snap fingers and go out of depression, it would be great. But it doesn't work this way. Telling someone, brace up, there are many others worse than you, amounts to dumping guilt and shame on that person. And a depressed person has enough guilt and shame as it is.
    I understand care4cats means well and all, but the opening post in this thread is no help to a depressed person :/.
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