I want to do it. I really do. But I am so afraid. Afraid it will hurt. Afraid I will fail and then afterwards, it will be worse. I dont know what to do. I tried to reach out for help, but no one came. I really just dont want to be here anymore. My arms hurt from cutting. I couldnt make myself cut deep enough. It hurt too much. The pain was distracting at first, but then it just hurt. I just dont want to be here anymore.