I'm so fucked up

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by 47x, Sep 24, 2011.

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  1. 47x

    47x New Member

    I'm obviously not alright. I been deeply depressed now for over 6 months, I tried to kill myself once during this period by cutting my wrist and taking some sleepingpills. Sadly it wasn't enough. I also have at least two plans on how I will succeed. Death by bridge and second by pills. I started cutting myself in April this year, first in an attempt to ease my pain, when that failed I started using the art of cutting as a way to punish and hurt myself. Say if I did something stupid I cut myself a little. In July this year I was admitted to a psych-ward (not willingly) since I'd stupidly told my psychologist about my plans. I only stayed there for 2 days since I manage to blame everything on my medicine. I got out and got a new medicine that I only ate for 2 weeks then I decided I wouldn't take it anymore since it would prevent me from feeling suicidal.

    So I cut myself yesterday again. I can't help it anymore. Problem is that I have a boyfriend and he'll notice. I happen to be one of the wicked persons who can't speak about all this shit because I feel that it's my problem, so I should take care of it. Involving others is unnecessary and shameful and painful for them.
  2. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Thanks for reaching out here and sharing your thoughts with us.
  3. windlepoons

    windlepoons Well-Known Member

    It's not just your problem its for all those who care about you, and I hope you can try to talk to them about the things that get to you.
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