im so fucking lost

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by iracund, Jul 7, 2007.

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  1. iracund

    iracund Antiquities Friend

    i went to dinner tonight with my mate and his son an a bunch of other members of his family. japanese. i had sushi and everyon elese went the habachi route. all through the dinner, i was callled on to be the photog because on of the sisters came in from indiana? and didn't have pix with the fam for a long time. after dinner, they all had pics in front of the waterfall in the front of the restaurant .... cousins with gramma, kids with gramma, kids witht their kids, the whole family all together ... and never once a pic of me with anyone. i didn't realize until we got in the car and started driving away that i was a little upset that i wasnt even't invited inti a pic even thogh i've been with my mate for almost 8 months. it was like i was the invisisble phtog. even though i know a TON of the family, the gramma included. so i came home, hid in bed for like 10 mins and then came out and listened to my mate telling me that he thinks my meds aren't working. i don't know, but i'm afraid that my next choices are zyprexa and lithium. and i don't want to be a zombie. i don't think i'm that bad off, just a little off kilter some times.

    so what the fuck??? i don't know. i don't know what to do. it seems that my mate either doesn't believe that i have problems that can't be solved by positive thinking or just doesn't thiink that my meds are working. either way ... im fucked. i don't know what to do. i have an appt in two weeks and he wants me to see the pdoc next week. wtf? maybe just cut alcohol out of the mix altogether. the week of experiment can't hurt. but ... i'm just so FUCKING CONFUSED .... it seems like nothing i try works. and tor the first time in my life i am REALLY TRYING. i want it all to be normal. and i feel like more of a basket case than ever. i'm about ready to give it up and go off everything cold turkey and say fuck it. AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!
     
  2. Jenny

    Jenny Staff Alumni

    Hiya

    Sorry for the late reply to your post. How are you doing now? I really hope that you haven't gone cold turkey with your medication.. i know things are frustrating for you, but please take your medication as prescribed and maybe raise your frustrations with your pdoc when you see him? Have you seen him yet or is the appointment this week? Hope it goes ok.

    And sorry about what happened at the meal with the photos too.. it does sound upsetting. Have you spoken to your friend about it?

    Hope you're doing ok.. keep talking here if it helps
    :hug:
    Jenny
     
  3. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Hi there. I agree. Maybe go off alcohol but certainly not your meds.

    Try not to take the picture thing too personally. They just happened to be taking some family photos and it probably didn't occur to them that they were being rude or that you wanted to have a picture too. Try sticking up for yourself next time! Say "Can someone please take a picture of me and my mate?" Most of the time, people are just wrapped up in their own stuff and aren't really thinking about how what they do affects others. It's rude, but not intentionally hurtful. If you want your feelings known, try to speak up more. People will respect you for it and your needs will be met a lot more often.
     
  4. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Thats really true. In those sort of situations people tend to be purely wrapped up in their own self and it is rude and sometimes it's done on purpose but most of the time it's not intentional. Next time just let them know that you want a pic taken with your mate.
     
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