I'm so scared of leaving my narcissist mother

Aj q8

Well-Known Member
#41
You have a reason to be afraid because she is actually a scary person so I won't tell you to ignore the feeling - but you can try to keep reminding yourself that she doesn't own you and never did and you have the right to live your own life. Not only does she have her own freedom, she has robbed you of yours. Hopefully once you are separate from we and experience the feeling of independence you have more self-empowerment to stand up against her.

If you can make a solid plan to leave when she isn't around, and you have people on the outside that can help you, then the main thing is getting away initially.

I am curious - is it safe for you to be at your grandfather's? Could this increase the abuse towards your grandfather or this this not the same one?

And can you get a restraining order on her? It should be illegal to keep your daughter hostage, unless Kuwait is okay with this inhumane concept. I don't remember but did you say the cops are corrupt?
She is going this afternoon to check on ticket prices..for her trip so things getting serious I guess.
I have the plan set and I think it over and over again in my head..
I will jump out of the window in the morning when my dad and brother out I will call a taxi and go to rent a car and then to the lawyer office and we will take it from there..
I'm keeping avidance that I'm locked up inside the house and have no key and that she is holding my passport and all legal papers I managed to get her writing this in a text message..
The lawyer told me he can make her signature restraining order
And this is my grandfather "her father"that I will go to his home bc I don't have any other place to go to and I can't afford to rent my own place not now at least.
So it will be an ugly legal Bateel with her and yes we have corroborated police her ..but hopefully with a lawyer by my side things won't be so bad like before..
Thanks God that the laws in Kuwait protect women's rights ofcourse not like Europe prayers US but things not so bad for women's in general..like I will get an welfare monthly payments until I can get on my feet ..
If I was from Saudi Arabia I would be fucked up bc what I'm going throw with my narcissist mother is the "normal every day life for women there!!"women there can't have a surgery without a male relative signature!!no mater how old the women is !!
So I hope I can pull my self together and leave her and have my life back ..
If everthing works I can be in school by this September ..
After 20 years of abuse I might be free ,only if I can find the courage to walk away when the time comes
 

Aj q8

Well-Known Member
#42
Yes I can imagine which is what makes it so hard...but maybe as believe you already have keep a mental list in your mind of all the reasons that you are doing this and go through it every day as a reminder to yourself that your reasons for leaving are entirely valid /justified and that though this will not be easy that deep down inside you do have the inner strength to see it through to start your own life. Sending you peaceful and self confident thoughts to you.
I really need that peaceful self confidence thoughs daer
But I think I know I can't go on living like this another 20 years or hoping that she will be "dead" when i wake up next day ..
It's not a normal way of living to go to bed each night wishing that you or you're abuser won't woke up the next day bc you're so ecxusted and tierd of all this abuse and you can't stand another day of all this to just keep going on and on
So I just hope I will go through with this
 

Rebreb

Well-Known Member
#43
It's horrific that this type of abuse is basically mandatory in Saudi Arabia. Maybe you can find strength for the sake of all of the women living in this type of prison. Imagine they are standing with you and celebrating your struggle for freedom.
 

Aj q8

Well-Known Member
#44
It's horrific that this type of abuse is basically mandatory in Saudi Arabia. Maybe you can find strength for the sake of all of the women living in this type of prison. Imagine they are standing with you and celebrating your struggle for freedom.
I know..its so horibel to live like this It's like being a slave with no way out
I think I'm lucky enough to have the law by my side and to have a law by my side
I think I will call him few days befor her return from her trip so she won't say I sabotaged her holiday i know it sounds stupid but I think I don't want her yelling and screaming on me about her spoiled holiday bc of me
 

Aj q8

Well-Known Member
#46
Just another example of her twisted logic -- when's the last time you went on holiday??
Tell me about it..
I went in 10 days holiday with my 2 brothers and her But bc she was so pissed off bc of me trying to make her agree that I go back to school she spent the whole holiday turning my brothers against me ..every night she go to their hotel room craying telling them how mean I'm to her and how I yell at her "and that's not true "she just lie to them and they belive her !!
And telling them that all I want from her is money to buy new shoes and clothes and if she doesn't give me the money I get upset!!
And one time we was at the mall and I wanted to buy a new coffe machine so I was going to pay for it by credit card bc I didn't have cash on me she offers to pay and I will give her the money back ..
But she went to my brothers telling them that I took advantage of her and I'm not going to pay her back!!and when I offer her the money she refused to take it !!
How about that for twisted mother !!
After this trip my brothers begin to hate me even more !a d I guess that's what she was aiming for bc she notice that me and my brothers start to feel slightly comfortable around each other for the fist time in 20 years !!
 

Aj q8

Well-Known Member
#48
I just read your story and feel worry about you bc i'm from Arab country too and can imagine the situation, What did you do dear?
Hi Mema..
Thanks for you're concern daer ..
I guess you being from the same area can really make it easier for you to understand what's it like to !!
In general I'm luckier than others ..around here
Things are much better lately at home no more fights no mate drama ..I hope you're having good things going on with you daer
 

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