I don't know how things got so bad. I'm slowly sinking down into a bottomless pit of despair, sorrow, and self-hatred. I'm scared that if I keep going, I'll never be free. I'm scared because I keep finding myself in the same place... hunched in the corner of my bed room with my cutting kit open and in use. Half the time, I don't even remember how I got there. I barely even come to until I'm cleaning up. I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to live like this. I don't want to live. But I'm too terrified to die.