hello everyone... it's been a long time since i last posted here. Back then i came here to help people..now I come here to look for help myself... or..just someone i have never met to listen to me. If someone is willing to listen..please read on: I'm a 18 year-old girl. recently...people discovered that im in a relationship..and asked me who it was. i refused to answer and kept it a secret. and ever since that day people start to spread rumors about me..being in a relationship with a woman or having an ugly boyfriend whom im ashamed of. people i thought were my friends participated in gossiping groups and such like. there is a reason I am not sharing personal information with people i dont trust. because i know it would spread like wildfire. and that is the least thing i would want to happen. i have my reasons for not telling. im stressed during exam times which also comes along with lack of sleep and ..there are just so many things crashing into me all at once...i feel like i cant handle it. I talked to my best friends..i talked to my loved one...and it helped me temporary..but after a short while..i go back to my suicidal self. The thing is..I dont want to hear "they are not worth it...now you know who is a true friend" or "you are worth more than those. just dont pay attention to those rumors, because that is what they want: to provoke you". or "if you kill yourself, remember who you're hurting the most with it..your parents and everyone who loves you" I dont want to hear that. I'm tired of hearing it. i know all of that...but it doesnt make me feel better. i just want everything to stop...i want it to stop now...i want to hide..i want to run away from this place.