I'm sorry but i can't go on anymore

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by sadhart, Feb 23, 2012.

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  1. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    It's clear my life is not going to get any better and i am stuck with no hope. i tried to call a crisis number...i mean i am grateful that something like that exists, but often times i find it hard to talk to the other person on the line. im tired of living in a family that always hold over my head what i can't do and yet never appreciate when i do things especially for them. they want to talk about not biting the hand that feeds me, well fuck them and their hypocrisy because they sure as hell take me for granted.

    i am trying to move forward with my life and doing whatever i can, but that isn't enough for these apparent perfect people. to top it off, there is too much pain from the past that never stops hurting.

    well im sick of this one sided bullshit. i may not have my own place or a car, and i don't have a job despite that i look, but this is MY life and I am going to take it. i am tired of people hurting me and not giving a shit but giving me guilt trip after guilt trip from people. i am done and i am sorry for sounding so weak and pathetic, but i am sick of this shit.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    YOU are not pathetic nor weak hun you keep going each day the best way you know how just as we all do. Your family is blind to your struggles and i am sorry they don't see the positives you do accomplish but you know you have done them that all that matters hun. I know it get so hard at times to keep going but you have hun and you need to step back from helping others and just take care of YOU okay sometimes just calling those crisis lines help because you can hear another voice on the other end let them talk okay hugs
     
  3. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    That's just it...I know what I have contributed to this family may not be a lot, but no one acknowledges it. And maybe that wouldn't bother me if they didn't hold over my head the fact im not totally independent. in that case, knowing what i have done isn't enough. i get in trouble for eating, hell i got in trouble because i took a nap...i mean excuse me for having a hard time sleeping at night and still being tired during the day.

    they throw in my face that i haven't accomplished some of the things people my age have, but when I try to open up about something that is bothering me, they throw in my face how someone is worse off than i am. well no shit on both ends.

    and sometimes i get scared when i call the crisis number because the person on the line may or may not be understanding. i know the people their have good intentions, but ive dealt with some assholes on that phone before.
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Me too hun ihave been hurt by some of the people there so i find it hard to call back It is a shame though because most are kind, I wish you could move out in your own space in a apartment for people who need help but want independance away from their family a home with assistance available hugs
     
  5. sadhart

    sadhart Well-Known Member

    I don't know if i misunderstood what you said but I don't need special assistance. i just am not in a financial position to to do alot. the problem is, when i am able to, it's hard finding support from family. they turn their nose up on the things that are gong right in my life because they don't approve of it. what it is most times really is that they are so closed minded and ignorant and they want me to tell them they're right even when they are wrong.

    a cousin told me last month that i shouldn't expect them to admit when they are wrong....yet im supposed to respect them because the are "elders" what his dumb fat ass forgot is that a person can lose respect just as well.
     
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