Everday I wake up thinking that it's a new day. Feeling refreshed, yet exhausted As my mind awaits the new horrors Yet to come. At night I do not sleep well. Tossing and turning, dreaming of you. As the new day arrives, and as I get up, All I can think of is you. I try to think of what I will say to you, What I want you to think of me, What I want to say to you. But everyday the same thing happens, I call and no one picks up the phone. I put the phone down feeling hurt and tired. But sometimes you do pick up. I am burning up inside, so happy you'd think I could fly! As time goes on, our conversations get less and less. All the things I wanted to say to you, can NEVER come out. I really want to talk to you about personal things, But I'm afraid you will have no time to listen, to care, to hear what I really say. What I really want to say. Somedays the emotions do come up and I get off the phone as fast as I can, saying my parents or my brother Are home. As I hang up the phone, I run to My Place, Only to abuse myself. Mentally, physically.... emotionally. The only thing that I really want to say to you, but can never get out, Is that I'm sorry I fell in love with you. I'm sorry that I got your attention that day. I'm sorry that we ever met. I'm sorry that what and who I am is somebody you do not want. I'm sorry that I feel what I feel. But most of all, I'm sorry for ALWAYS being there for you. _________________________________________________ It hurt to write this, because I wrote it when I felt so alone, it seemed like no one would listen to me.