i'm stupid

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by muntix, Oct 25, 2009.

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  1. muntix

    muntix Member

    last night i try to kill myself but that didn't work
    i couldn't even kill myself .i have no friend no job nothing.when i'm talking with somone my brain lock up and i do stupid things and embrass myself
    i'm a usless Piece of meat.i wish someone kills me cuz i dont have the guts to end this stupid life.may be if i was alone in an island i could continue this miserable life. i always feel anxious around people.i fear their find out how stupid i am.icouldnt sy this things to anyone face to face even my mom.sorry for bad english.
  2. Tam

    Tam Well-Known Member

    Hi Muntix,

    Well it's a good job it didn't work, though you might not feel that way. You sound really down on yourself - want to explain a bit more why? I can see how what you say about being with people makes you feel bad - is there anything else making you feel this way?
  3. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Welcome to the forum muntix!! You should seriosly think about getting professional help.. This may mean telling your mom..Sit down and write your thoughts out on a peice of paper and let your mom read it..After my last attempt that is what I did and handed it to my sister.. She called the hospital and they told her to bring me in..I eneded up on the phsyc ward for a montha nd a half..They kept me so long because they put me on meds and they wanted to make sure they were working..I have been back in the hospital ten times do to med changes..Also a big part of healing is to see a therapist.. Someone you can be comfortable with and learn how to better cope with your thoughts..
  4. sorry

    sorry Member

    Dear Muntix -- You are not alone..if that could be of any help?

    Not that I think we are both stupid together. For no human being alive ever deserves being called so. Stupidity is a self-made opinion, and for that matter, I see that you feel anxious around people because you try to study their opinion by looking into the mirror of your own opinion about yourself. You must realize that this mirror image you see of them isn't always exactly a truth image.
    Secondly, this stupidity notion is, I feel that, coming of your introvert cast of behavior. When you don't have anyone at hand to talk out personal matters with, you would inevitably do silly things in front of others (note: silly, not stupid), having bottled up all your problems inside for enough long. But soon towards the end of your silly gestural acts calling for someone to listen or help you out, you would come to know that nobody has paid any attention towards you. Usually when you do something, and heads around you show no concern, this is where one feels stupid--though he is not.
    That brings me to the point of it: Find someone to verbally throw out your problems upon. As you said you can't even talk them out with your mom--the closest who should have been to you--do find someone for that job--whether it be someone from your real life or someone from over here in SF..Of course I am always here for you to listen to. Please don't kill yourself. You matter a lot to this otherwise seemingly unconcerned world.
  5. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    Your english is fine, don't worry about that! Welcome to SF!! Not that I want you to isolate yourself but you mention being on an island.

    You can create your own island. Stay close to those you are comfortable with right now, like your family if possible or even this site. Surround yourself and take solace in your favorite books and music. Even in isloation you can control your surroundings.

  6. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Hey muntix welcome to the forum, dont worry about the english, i actually am english and struggle with it half the time!!! Seriously though, we are all going through the same thing and there is always someone here for you to chat to if you need help ok. Im normally around so send me a message ok. Whats happened to make you suicidal??? Anything specific?? Im sure there is someone that loves you and you probably have friends but it just doesnt feel like it at the moment. Keep posting if it makes you feel better
  7. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hiya muntix

    welcome to the forums!

    Don't worry about your english it's fine!
    Im glad your plan didnt work. I can relate to much of what you said. How old are you,if you dont mind me asking?
    What you have described is social anxiety. Have you had a diagnosis? Seen a doctor perhaps? If not, its the route to take :)
    There is help but you have to reach out for it , feel free to PM me anytime :hug:
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