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I'm too ugly.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Mylesk, May 23, 2010.

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  1. Mylesk

    Mylesk Member

    I know this is going to sound stupid and self-centered. And it is. My ugly features make me feel suicidal. And this is not just me saying this. I have gone to anonymous sited like Omegle and asked people what they think of a picture of me. Not one person out of around eighty said that I was even somewhat attractive. I know that there are far more unattractive people than me who go on with their lives without thinking about it, but I am not one of them. I feel as though I am letting my parents down by never having a relationship with a woman, but I feel awkward around them because of my insecurity. I know I can't kill myself because my mother would be too devastated but I feel like living on would be much worse for myself. I'm sorry for wasting your time. I just needed to get this out of my head.
  2. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    First of all, people on sites like Omegle are anonymous. There have been many studies done that show that people are crueller and less likely to compliment when they are anonymous.

    I can certainly understand being nervous about dating. I have a lot of anxiety because of the way I percieve myself. I have to constantly tell myself that I am the only one that sees myself that way (anonymous people on the internet don't count. You can't date them, anyway, so they don't matter.)

    You haven't wasted anyone's time. We're here to listen.
  3. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry you feel that way about yourself......and I know you won't believe me when I say it's not what's on the outside that matters it's what's inside that counts....
    those of us who have low self esteems tend to focus on our bad points rather than our good points........
    I don't think you should place too much faith in the strangers who looked at your picture on omegle ....
    you will find someone one day who loves you for who you are....
    try reading some books on self esteem and confidence.....and therapy would help...
    take care...
  4. Pow

    Pow Well-Known Member

    I don't think it's fair for people to judge if they don't know you.
    You could of posted a picture of an attractive woman and they could have still be saying the womans ugly because they can.
    If they told you that you we're beautiful then what? You weren't planning to build a relationship with any of them so why do they matter?
    All i'm trying to say is beauty can only go so far but personality is way more important.
  5. Damned.

    Damned. Account Closed

    Fuck them.

    Most people are brainless animals.

    Stop looking to animals for approval and start looking to them for utility.

    Find your passion in life and pursue it aggressively and without apology.

    Women will pick up on your drive and confidence.
  6. alloutoftears

    alloutoftears Account Closed

    there is one cure for those who are not blessed with attractive features

    money, get money and you will have all the attention you will ever need

    but be warned, its a double edged sword you wont find love.

    women and men are fickle at the best of times, a thick skin and a good sense of humor will help you accept this unbalanced playing field.

    i hope you buck the trend and find the love you deserve. :)
  7. shazwackers

    shazwackers Well-Known Member

    Do you have a good sense of humour? .....are you kind and honest?..........they're a million times more important to a girl than looks..............also I know really attractive people who are just not photogenic,....photos are never a true representation of a person

    There's a guy around where I live who is not what you'd call attractive, and he's very short and you know he's just started dating this really pretty girl, and everyone is like.............what the hell is going on?..........and I say 'kudos to you man'..............so get out there and hold your head up high............I really wish you all the very best.....................shaz
  8. MeAndYou

    MeAndYou Well-Known Member

    :i'm sorry:

    I have the same issue, (and have had it for a while).

    I'm normally a very caring, sympathetic, funny, humble guy. I love life, and all the small things. Coffee in the morning, sunshine through the clouds. People helping other people. A good book on a rainy day. I love it! But holy shit how easily people seem to be able to steal that away from me.

    In short...i'm hideous. I know this for a fact. My facial structure is incapable of stimulating chemical reactions in other peoples brains that make them feel good. I get treated like i'm hideous by completely random people just because i'm hideous. The way completely random strangers treat me makes me feel like none of that matters. I get treated like a creep, a serial killer, a worthless piece of shit in general. I end up asking myself why I don't just become what people automatically see me as? A creep. A serial killer. A worthless individual and quickly conclude i'd rather kill myself.

    I've realized a few things being an ugly individual, (not that, that is a prerequisite :tongue: ). Looks matter only as much as you let them, for the most part. Someone who likes you for who you are on the inside is generally not going to care one bit what you physically have no control over. Those are beautiful people that you should do your best to keep close to you. As far as the assholes in this world. There are not as many as you might think. The few assholes ruin your perception of people in general. But the power they have over you and your emotions is whatever power you let them have. You can ignore them, or you can let them take control of you. You can prove them wrong by harming them or yourself, (aka allowing a random person to steal your life and emotions thus proving them right), or by working hard towards something you're passionate about that will allow you comfort and happiness.

    Sometimes people are mean because they themselves are insecure, (not all the time..but sometimes). So the next time someone says something mean to you, or makes you feel like shit, put yourself in their shoes. (its so very difficult..i know..but try). Sometimes these people are in so much pain the only way they feel they can go on is by making someone else feel that same pain. Think of how alone they must feel. They feel they've lost control and resort to stealing you, emotionally. That is a dark place to be. Many of us can relate. Keep that in mind and forgiveness comes a little more easily, followed by healing.

    And last...nothing lasts. Not even physical beauty. Not life, not happiness, not sadness. It is a constant ebb and flow that doesn't discriminate. Physically unattractive people have to deal with it, physically attractive people do as well. So when you feel like you've given up control to inconsiderate individuals and the only way you feel you can control your life is by taking it, take a couple deep breaths and wait. There is always another bend in the road and you never know what is around the corner.

    :donut: long live donuts.
    Last edited by a moderator: May 23, 2010
  9. PollyAnna

    PollyAnna Account Closed

    you have not wasted anyone's time, sweetheart.
    you, nor I, nor anyone, Is ugly! I personally think those considered unappealing are the most beautiful people In the world. We may not mount up to society's standards, but we're unique!I know how you feel 100% because I've always been targetted about my appearence, but not so much anymore. The more Insults i got, the more I believed people. I took action! But, I realized I was beautifying myself for others. Not for myself& I stopped. I looked Into the mirror for quiet a while and saw that those who judged me, Incredibly misjudged me! I saw that I really liked two of my features the most.My lips and my asian-like twinkly eyes. Then, I began accepting my appearence little by little and now, I like my whole appearence. I didn't need any appearence alteration! I am unique looking!Sweety,there's always going to be people In this world who judge you, but It's up to you to believe otherwise. Who Is anyone to judge, anyways? And don't trust the Internet to judge you! You might have a low self-esteem because of your looks, but please don't. That surely keeps you from doing many things, trust me. Try to start thinking positively when you're in a situation regarding your looks. don't think ''i bet she thinks im ugly'' think ''i bet im not any typical guy she's seen before & my personality is a great addition'' :). Have pride In looking different! don't even try to get a makeover, or anything. Real confidence comes from acceptance, and confidence Is appealing :)! Your face should be the extra addition to your personality. If a girl doesn't find you attractive , then so be It. She's not worth It. It's your personality that counts. They're missing out, and you and I know It.Please look Into the mirror tonight, and find a facial feature or two that you like. I am sure you will discover you are a handsome fellow. :) I'd surely date you because I'm open-minded and you come off as a sweet guy. :biggrin:
    Last edited by a moderator: May 23, 2010
  10. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    I will join the ranks of those who will say they are ugly too. I guess it is because I feel ugly. I want to believe it is what is on the inside that matters. Then I look at my insides and say "Wow trash here too". On one forum I was told that when it comes to guys being attractive you have to like yourself. Most men on other forums tell me that women are a lot more hypersensitive to your general emotions. So if you are at least happy you will appear more attractive to women.. or something... I personally think they are full of it.

    :S guess I am not being very helpful. All I can really say is that I relate. No matter how many of my online female friends tell me I am cute, I still feel hideous. At the same time I know that I judging my attractiveness on the number of females that I have managed to bring into my life. As well as the kind of female I am attracted too.

    Anyway you are not alone. I am trying to think of ways to make myself more attractive. I am starting out with working out. I feel hideous because I am fat. If anything the endorphins will make me feel better.

    @alloutoftears: When I read this post I thought "How Much Money" because compared to most people my age I am loaded.
  11. Kaos General

    Kaos General Well-Known Member

    Just wanted to let you know a bit about Omegle.

    The vast majority of that site is people who frequent a site called 4chan. in case you havent heard 4chan is renknowned for insulting and upsetting people. Its not the best place to go and ask what people think anout you to be fair.

    Im sure your not ugly at all its just 4chans purpise is to upset people
  12. Viro

    Viro Well-Known Member

    /b/ is not a pleasant place to be yourself
  13. charmane

    charmane Well-Known Member

    I've never heard of that site and I'm glad I haven't. Why would you seek validation from a bunch of strangers on the internet? There are so many sites where they take beautiful people and start picking them apart for the size of their noses or a little ripple of cellulite or their eyes are too close together etc. That's why that Heidi Montag got 10 plastic surgeries in one day. She was beautiful when she started and now she can't move her face!

    My son is 23 and he feels the same way about himself. He doesn't date because he has such a devastatingly bad self image. He told me he looks like a dog. He is actually very good-looking and he looks nothing like a dog. He suffers from body dysmorphic disorder where a person can look in the mirror and they don't see what everyone else sees. They see a distorted image of themselves. This is what happens to anorexics who see themselves as fat even when they are walking skeletons.

    Please seek some counseling for this problem. It is ruining your life and it sounds like it is an obsession for you. Stop seeking validation from such places - the world is very harsh nowadays and people just plain enjoy messing with those on the internet. You will find someone who shares your hopes, dreams and interests if you look in the right places. Start reaching outward instead of obssessing on the inward and things will get better and you will be able to put things into proper perspective. Think about all the people you see on TV and movies, some short, fat, bald, big - nose, crazy eyes, crazy hair etc. Don't keep dwelling on some superficial idea of perfection that is being fed to you by the mass media. Keep trying - we care.
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