I'm seriously sick of the redundancy; every day it's the same thing, and even when things DO change, it's practically always for the worse. Nobody needs me; only for superficial reasons and to be a doll... someone to be seen and not heard... and that's if I'm lucky. I can't think of any worse state of mind than dealing with people who pretend to care about me and my well-being yet when I want to do the one thing to SAVE MY LIFE (quit my job) all I get is constant disapproval. People are stupid sheep and refuse to "shit or get off the pot." If you hate me, DO IT ALL THE WAY! Same goes for love! I'm fucking SICK of these assholes who ostracize and ignore me, yet when I get down and express anger or sadness, THEN all of a sudden they seem to care! FUCK THEM! FUCK THEM ALL IN THE EAR! Love is never easy... I'm probably less than a nobody to the woman of my dreams, and can I blame her? She doesn't need me; she has tons of friends who love and support her and tons of guys that are interested in her... I'm likely worth less than nothing to her. To most people, I'm nothing more than a warm body... hopefully soon I'll be a cold, limp, lifeless one. btw, to anyone who reads this who goes on chat too... sorry I'm acting like an asshole lately. I'm lonely and on a short fuse 'cause of various things... and one of my best friends on here got really sick and hardly remembers me and another one hasn't been around in weeks and I just hope she's ok. again, here's to hoping I die in my sleep.