I'm..what the hell am I?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by seishou, Oct 24, 2007.

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  1. seishou

    seishou Guest

    I've spent the better part of the time I've been a member here to try and make a post about what troubles me, why it troubles me, what I feel and why I feel that way. Whenever I start writing about my troubles it just has no end(meaning it turns into relentless babbeling, much like this, only longer). I copy pasted what I wrote over on microsoft word and ended up with 4 pages of crap. Honestly, I don't think it matters anyway. The only thing I'm sure of is that I have no desire to remain alive anymore. I've been waiting for something in my life to improve...tried to improve it myself, but I've realised...that isn't going to happen. Everytime I move one step forward I get pulled two steps back. It's been like this for almost 20 years now, with no end in sight. So why should I keep on moving forward? It's pretty sad actually, my only enjoyment left in life is games and anime now. And what keeps me from killing myself is fear. Kinda pathetic :/

    It's probably my own fault as well, even though I don't want to realise it. I came here to find help, but I honestly don't deserve that. Nor do I see how it's possible to help me when I don't know what's wrong to start with. yet here I am >.< Don't feel obliged to post or anything, just an annoying rant I guess.
  2. sorrowstealer

    sorrowstealer Member

    This is not an annoying rant by any means. We are here for you to vent to. Don't let life get you, this world is out for our destruction. We can't let this world win. We gotta keep fighting. This forum is a support group. If we ban together, this world can't and won't win. Just know that this is a family and we are here for each other. I know that I'm new, but I want to be part of this family.
  3. lil-sis-one-of-two

    lil-sis-one-of-two Well-Known Member

    I have only been on here for a week and I have been made to feel so at home, I feel safe here.
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