In Memory Of Mathew Amos

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by Cerberus, Sep 10, 2007.

  1. Cerberus

    Cerberus Well-Known Member

    I was sent this forum a few days ago. After a few days of selfsearching and an emotional rollarcoaster, i am able to talk (type) about it. Last weekend my little brother (15) spent the weekend with me as he did most of the summer. He was a good kid , just confused on life and what really matters. He was infatuated with death. Last monday i took him back home so he could go to school the following day. He called me tuesday afternoon stating he took a bunch of pills and this would be the last time we talked. I called pops to find out where he was and let him know what is going on. He wasn't to concerned as he does things to get attention. Wedsnesday i got a phone call that my littlebrother died from heart failure in the hospital around 8:30 am. I was so distraught and shocked just thinking it was a dream. For the next few days i second guessed myself and wondered what i could have done diffrent. I gave him everything he wanted and more love than he could handle. I tried to show him right from wrong. I just wanted a better life for him than what i have had. He absolutly hated where he lived and wanted to live with me. I just couldn't do it right now. I have come to peace with his descion and realized there is nothing i could have done. Once the descion is made it will happen. I couldn't be with him 24/7. I love him and miss him aand one day we will be hanging out again.
  2. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    :sad: :hug:
  3. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    :hug: So sorry to hear about the loss of your brother. :sad:
  4. johnsmythe

    johnsmythe Well-Known Member

    I can only imagine the pain you must feel... I hope you get through this, I really do.
  5. liveinhope

    liveinhope Well-Known Member

    IM SO SORRY :sad:
  6. I'm sorry for your loss. Remember nothing you could have done could have changed things. He was meant to be somewhere better. xxx you could not control it. Please don't feel guilt but feel your grief. It is up and down but it does ease.
  7. Beret

    Beret Staff Alumni

    So sorry for your loss :(
  8. gag

    gag Well-Known Member

    I can't really imagine how that feels, but I'm sorry for your loss man.

    The one reason I haven't killed myself is because I don't want my family and friends to feel what you feel right now.
  9. White Dove

    White Dove Well-Known Member

    I am so sorry this happened to you..

    if you ever need to talk i am here and only a pm away..