in the midst of a meltdown

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by betteroffunknown, Aug 12, 2016.

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  1. betteroffunknown

    betteroffunknown Well-Known Member

    Sorry to dump this one you, but figured I should probably try to reach out.

    I admit I didn't wake up in the best space today, but that aside the day still started off on the wrong foot. As such, I've become severely snappy, even at my poor dog. I have NOT hit her (NEVER would), but she's very confused why I'm so bent out of shape. Poor thing!

    I really am in the midst of a meltdown, and not sure how it's gonna end, but it's not looking good right now. It's not gonna take much, if anything, to push me to and/or over the edge.
  2. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support SF Artist SF Supporter

    Hey my friend, what's wrong and how can I help?
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  3. betteroffunknown

    betteroffunknown Well-Known Member

    Thanks, friend. It's really more of a case to say what isn't wrong, and what's even worse it's even the little things that are REALLY getting to me.

    This is a good analogy that also happens to be an experience that happened to me just this morning, but it really shares how that even the little things are getting to me.

    This morning I decided to take my dog for a nice long walk since it was so cool out. Along the way she, of course, took care of both lines of business, and we continued on our way. In my hands I had the leash, my mug (for my soda) and the bag of crap.

    We got about a quarter of our way into the walk when I slipped on the sidewalk, and went down hard. Didn't have but a few scrapes, so brushed the rocks and dirt off me, and proceeded to go on our way. Had only made it a few short steps when I realized there was a hole in the crap bag, so of course I had to check to see if there was any on me. I gave myself a quick look over, and realized there was some on the left side of my shirt (a nice shirt no less), so turned around is what we did. Obviously I needed to change.

    On our way back my dog started barking at another dog which is her way of saying, "I want to meet you." But of course with the way she barks most dog owners don't buy that. (She has an intimidating bark even though she's very gentle.) Harshly, I pulled her back, and told her to hush. I am getting tired of the fact she does that.

    So we get back to the house, and it occurred to me to check my mug to see if had cracked. The last time I hit a mug against something it broke it to the point it couldn't be used again. It was then that I spotted crap (from the bag) on the bottom of the mug. Frustrated and grumbling I cleaned the mug, and set it down to dry. Then I quickly replaced my shirt, and started the load of laundry that was waiting anyways.

    Headed off to the front part of the house, and couldn't escape the fact I was still smelling crap even though I wasn't immediately seeing it. I had stepped outside to have a smoke, came inside and decided to take off my medical bracelet, and that's when I noticed I had crap at the top of my hand near the bracelet, and even a trace of it on the bracelet itself. At that point I'm thinking, "Will it never stop?!" It was the frustration that I kept finding more crap, but after I washed my hands and the bracelet I thought it was the end of it.

    I went outside to have another part of the smoke that I had started just before when I looked down, and noticed there was even crap on my last pair of decent shorts. (Have more, just don't like them as much. They don't fit well.) I freaked out - again, and hurried up and ran inside to change them to get them in the washer since it was already going.

    And that's how things have been working lately. Just when I think there couldn't be anymore crap more appears. It's never anything huge (although the neighbors situations are bigger), but it's continually something. I'm ready to tell my neighbor off who's been ordered to have no contact with me. She tried pulling crap yesterday, and getting VERY sick of her passive aggressive behavior, and now need to take my dog on walks to different places (won't get into it right now), and just every other little thing that's adding up.

    Sorry for the vent, but honestly not sure how much longer I even want to 'tolerate' the little stuff. It's ALL getting to me FAR more than norm!!
  4. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support SF Artist SF Supporter

    Hey Liz, you had a rough day and I sure know that it's the little things that escalate out of proportion and get u s wound up. I do the same thing. I'm trying to change that by just stopping everything when it starts. If I'm in that kind of mood I try and stay away from people and go someplace's all I know how to handle it now. If I keep going the anxiety kicks in and overwhelms me. Stop....relax and breathe, simple but it does help. I'm sorry you had a bad day and hopefully tomorrows better my friend.
  5. Deety

    Deety SF Supporter

    Wow, it sounds like a really crappy day! Yes, sometimes those little things just build up and up until they feel insurmountable. I'm sorry you have trouble with your neighbour, that is never a small thing, because they are right there, beside you! You can't get away from neighbour trouble and it can play on your mind a lot more than a similar problem which isn't so physically (and therefore mentally) imposing.
    I hope you are feeling better, take care.
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