in the mire

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by thebaronspell, May 18, 2011.

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  1. thebaronspell

    thebaronspell Well-Known Member

    I just can't find the energy to do the simple things in life at the moment. I really would like to have a facial shave but I'd only wish for the Razor to be blunt. I recently joined a local gym with my best mate but I've recently found out he has been lying to me about stuff and it seems that all my friends find me boring to be around. The only person who would probably understand me is an ex girlfriend who I used to date in school. We've been mates forever and she lives two minutes away but I recently starting getting feelings for her again but she seems so content with having a no strings attached sexual thing with somebody from our old school days. She grew up with a Father who wasn't very much interested in her either but I'd find it hard to tell her how I feel.
     
  2. poisonedresistance

    poisonedresistance Well-Known Member

    Thats a hard one,, i really dont envy your decision i do wish you the best of luck in your choices though.
    perhaps you could talk to her, not being too open but dip your toes in the water a little to get an idea of how she feels
     
  3. thebaronspell

    thebaronspell Well-Known Member

    I was prepared to do that but the other week she joked that I should of been born a woman because she only found it easy to talk to me about her relationship with the guy she is seeing and she said other men shouldn't know what to say in terms of advice but I did. I'm not really an emotional person, I haven't cried in years and I feel kind of dark inside but I manage to cover it up on the outside acting light hearted and camp in humour and I would dread for her to think I'm gay when I'm not because I really like her. She was my first ever girlfriend and a big part of my past and currently a big part in my present.
     
  4. poisonedresistance

    poisonedresistance Well-Known Member

    is she still in the relationship you gave her advice about as testing the waters then could be really dodgy
     
  5. thebaronspell

    thebaronspell Well-Known Member

    Yeah well she asked me if I thought he was a player in terms of womanizing and I said not really but everybody seems to hate him but I've never had a problem with the guy. I probably drew her closer to him but she said it was only a sexual thing and that he was reluctant to ask her out.
     
  6. Crash106

    Crash106 Member

    Would you be happy to accept her as she is?

    Do you need a friend to talk to more than a reluctant bed mate?
     
  7. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    I think you should tell her how you feel.. Let her know you are a good listener because you care about her.. All she can say is no..You can still be friends..If you don't try then nothing will hasppen..
     
  8. poisonedresistance

    poisonedresistance Well-Known Member

    i dont agree, telling her how you feel could close her up and ruin a good friendship. are you ok with just being friends with her, at least untill this guy is out of the picture,, you have to understand he may never leave the picture but if he did,, you never know. i wouldnt destroy a good friendship if i could help it, id rather have someone i loved in my life as friends than not at all
     
  9. thebaronspell

    thebaronspell Well-Known Member

    I probably don't have the guts to ask her anyway. I'm not looking for a sex buddy just somebody who will love me. I get the feeling she is fed up of waiting for him to ask her out. I'll stay on the sidelines until I'm told to take my tracky bottoms off.
     
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