No not stupid at all your vivid imagination or psychosis whatever it is just a tool you have been using to keep you going. The world outside your world can be just as beautiful look around and see all the diffenrent species we have from the water to the sky. There is peaceful places as well. You need to talk with a professional on how to get you out of your head into reality and how to cope here. Meds therapy vivid imagination is good to a point but you need to find other means now to create the peace you desire. Talk to a professional someone who has the skills to help you.