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inceldom

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#1
I noticed a lot of users upset by my statement about inceldom
in practice according to most of users in this forum there is nothing wrong in not being in a relationship but when I asked if they have a sexual life no one answered (and the reason is imaginable..)
a man need to have a sexual life expect for the tiny minority of asexual men, but only few men can have short-term relationships so the great majority need a stable relationship to get laid
so your solution is being abstinent?
also, I noticed a very bad reaction every time a user name the term "inceldom" and some days ago a user got banned when he opened a topic about this
why so much negative reactions about lonely and depressed young men in a suicidal site?
you should be on their side tbh
I expected more empathy in a site like this
 
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sinking_ship

woman overboard
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#2
There is nothing wrong with loneliness. Most here can empathize with that.

The incel movement however is not about loneliness. It's about men who can't find sexual partners and blame women as a whole for that. It's a bitter and hateful movement against women. If that is what you are identifying with, then yes, there is not a place for that here. Half of us are women too.
 

Sunspots

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#4
The term "incel" has very negative connotations. It has become a term used to describe a group of men who hate women, blaming them for their lack of sex. Many incels are actively violent towards women. It is entirely wrong to blame an entire gender for your lack of sex.

A man does not need a sex life although many would like one. The same goes for women.

People who are lonely and depressed, whatever gender, will always be supported here but a self proclaimed incel is likely to deeply offend most of the members here.
 
#5
so I understand the ban of the self-proclamed incel the other day
there is not a good idea here about them
so you support suicidal depressed people only if they do not suffer lack of sex / relationships?
mmh..
 

Lux

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#6
so in a suicidal forum there is no place for lonely and virgin guys?
I think the point is the term 'incel', not how you're feeling, as others have pointed out above.

If you want to blame women for your loneliness and identify very openly as "incel", I know there are loads of forums out there for that and I'm not judging you or stopping from going to them, to each their own, whatever.

However, if you want to discuss these feelings of loneliness, lack of sex etc without insulting someone based on their gender or anything else for that matter, then go ahead, you are welcome and we are here for you through your struggles.
 

Sunspots

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#10
So many people here of all genders feel desperately lonely and isolated. They crave that deep connection (and sex is often but not always) included in that. I'm sorry if this is how you also feel, it's a horrible way to feel.

if you do not get laid you are an incel either if you define yourself with this word or not
This is the tricky bit. When the word "incel" was first used a couple of decades ago it was a shortened version of "involuntary celibate". But over the years its meaning has changed to one of hate and violence. Many words over the years have become unacceptable as times and attitudes change and incel is one of them.

I totally get what you're trying to say and many people will happily admit to being celibate not through choice but would no longer use the word incel as that would indicate that they hate and blame women for it.
 

Walker

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#11
if you do not get laid you are an incel either if you define yourself with this word or not
This is completely inaccurate and you should watch what you define yourself as or I can guarantee you'll never get laid because no woman is fucking anyone who identifies themselves as an incel. Incels, by definition, blame women for not getting laid when really it's your piss poor attitudes towards others and inability to treat people as equals.
 

Ash600

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#12
Why should they feel to the need to classify them in such a way and so be associated with that category? As already stated, Incel is associated with it's members blaming women for their lack of sexual relationships. That's just a pitiful attempt at trying to apportion the blame elsewhere other than themselves. Who's responsible for someone's looks, personality. charisma etc is it the male or the female he's trying to get with?
 

Nick the Fantastical Duck

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#13
I'm not sure you are using the same definition of the word.
so you support suicidal depressed people only if they do not suffer lack of sex / relationships?
This is just false. I'm not in a relationship and I haven't had sex in god knows how long. That has nothing to do with whether or not I can get support on this site.

I don't view women as less then myself or the cause of my problems. I don't see women as evil. The incel movement DOES. That is not allowed here. Treating one gender as evil and the cause of your problems, is not allowed.
 

sinking_ship

woman overboard
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#15
maybe most of you do not understand the main point
if you do not get laid you are an incel either if you define yourself with this word or not
No, that's not true. The word has a meaning and a community involved with it. Plenty of people here are lonely, and I know there are many who are virgins and don't want to be. There is nothing wrong with wanting companionship or sex. But to identify with the word 'incel' is to identify with blaming women for your lack of sex, and treating them as less than.

You are very welcome here to discuss your loneliness and we will empathize with you for it. You are not welcome to express hatred toward half of the species. If you really don't understand what we're saying, you should read up on what the word incel really means.
 

Optimistic Goatman

The woolly enigmatic one
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#16
maybe most of you do not understand the main point
if you do not get laid you are an incel either if you define yourself with this word or not
Urban Dictionary:
"incel
aka "involuntarily celibate", a person (usually male) who has a horrible personality and treats women like sexual objects and thinks his lack of a sex life comes from being "ugly" when its really just his blatant sexism and terrible attitude."

Wikipedia:
"Incel
Incels (/ˈɪnsɛlz/ IN-selz), a portmanteau of "involuntary celibates", are members of an online subculture who define themselves as unable to find a romantic or sexual partner despite desiring one.[1][2][3] Discussions in incel forums are often characterized by resentment, misogyny, misanthropy, self-pity and self-loathing, racism, a sense of entitlement to sex, and the endorsement of violence against sexually active people"
"At least six mass murders, resulting in a total of 44 deaths, have been committed since 2014 by men who have either self-identified as incels or who had mentioned incel-related names and writings in their private writings or Internet postings. Incel communities have been criticized by the media and researchers for being misogynistic, encouraging violence, spreading extremist views, and radicalizing their members.[2][23][24][20] Beginning in 2018, the incel ideology has increasingly been described as a terrorism threat, and a February 2020 attack in Toronto, Canada became the first instance of allegedly incel-related violence to be prosecuted as an act of terrorism. "

GQ:
"What does incel stand for?
Incel stands for "involuntary celibate" – the name assumed by deeply misogynistic men who believe women are to blame for their lack of sexual intimacy. Incels often believe women should be verbally shamed and, in extreme, physically punished with sexual assault, rape or disfigurement. Coming together on internet communities such as Reddit, "incels" categorise society into two camps, the "Chads" (attractive men) and "femoids" or "Stacys" (attractive women who the Chads find attractive)"

The definition present in the Oxford English Dictionary:
"incel
noun [ C ]
/ˈɪn.sel/ US /ˈɪn.sel/
a member of a group of people on the internet who are unable to find sexual partners despite wanting them, and who express hate towards people whom they blame for this:
The word incel is short for "involuntary celibate".
Incels obsess over their own unattractiveness.
More examples
These are just a few choices from the first few results of thousands that pop up when you search for this. I could have kept going like that for a long time. Absolutely nobody outside of an incel community would ever agree with you on this point, stop arguing something so obviously wrong.
 

Cagla

Chainsmoker
#18
There is nothing wrong with loneliness. Most here can empathize with that.

The incel movement however is not about loneliness. It's about men who can't find sexual partners and blame women as a whole for that. It's a bitter and hateful movement against women. If that is what you are identifying with, then yes, there is not a place for that here. Half of us are women too.
That's the best statement about that movement I have ever seen.
I don't think women who don't have sexual lives blame men as whole. But those who think are incels do that and ...I know this because I spent some time reading those forums or Reddit posts...they're really hateful and they think women should care for them even tho those women aren't attracted to them, they say those women are shallows while they again make fun of oversized women etc...most of them write those kinda things. So you can conclude it's not just a loneliness thing.
Btw I'm one of the loneliest women around and I can understand being lonely is hard in today's society..as you are seen abnormal by many people. But one should see that no one owes you anything. If you're lonely, you're lonely. Maybe you have some flaws. Maybe you're not social enough or yeah maybe you're ugly just like me. But it's not someone else's fault. No one has to love you. That's it. Really.
 

Walker

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#20
Hey -
The op here is trying to have a conversation so if the topic makes you incredibly irate, which no one is faulting you for, then just back out like any other thread we have here. It's not okay to be insulting to anyone here regardless of how we feel about the topic or personal ignorances that may be involved. If you want to carry on with this topic then do so, if you can't maintain your composure then keep scrolling.
 
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