Discussion in 'After Effects' started by BeteNoir, Jun 27, 2008.

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  1. BeteNoir

    BeteNoir New Member

    For me suicide has forever altered my thought process. I feel broken(at least more damaged than before) like I lost something. I lost all hope of ever stopping the hurt. I finally realized i'm trapped in this. I've tried some many times without avail. Always some freak occurrence to wrestle me back to the loneliness, self loathing, poverty, confusion, insecurities, turmoil, ugliness that has and always will be my existence. So many beautiful much agony. What keeps me anchored is the fear of serious but survivable injury. I've lost so much I can't afford to live with more missing pieces. I've seen so many lovely people torn apart by this existence:mad:. It's hard to stay focused on going on. Thnx for just listening.
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi Bete..I have been there...feeling like I was way too damaged to live a life, but today, I have started to finally be in the world...all of this to say, please find support (both professional and peer) and continue to tell your story...we are here and want you to feel safe and cared for...PM me if I can help in any way...big hugs, J
  3. SweetSurrender

    SweetSurrender Well-Known Member

    Yes, sometimes i feel like that. Sometimes i feel like the world is a brutely ugly place filled only with pain. Sometimes i feel like i'm the only one that see's this. Sometimes i say i'd have given up all my happiness to be rid of my pain. But sometimes i realise that actually there is a balance, and that we need to keep fighting to maintain that balance. Yes, sometimes it seems like an impossible task, with no progress made......but to be honest, every little thing you do has so much affect - with one smile you can in affect, save someones life. It is no more obvious than one this forum. There is good out there - what i do is i stop watching the news, stop reading any newspapers, stop watching any tv that can too much of a negative impact. I take some time to go out and sit in the park, or get a coffee, just give my brain a break from all the pain out there. Sometimes i feel i must always think about everything, but i'm starting to realise that's not possible...and it is not shallow to sometimes think only about the immediate things in my life.
    It will get easier, take care.
  4. jerrin

    jerrin Guest

    This is not a big thing as you told here. I know there are several peoples who undergoes with depression and feel like his life is just gone hell and nothing is there in life. But all these things are only bad evils. I think if you do some work according to your mood and feel like you are here for doing some thing then most probably you will get all the things which you require.
  5. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    I know how you feel, i have been where you are. Things do get better though, there is hope.
    Take care of yoursled and don't give up just yet. There's still hope. :hug:
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