I am a member here, but I can't say who I am because I'm ashamed. I think I may be completely losing my mind. I'm extremely paranoid, every time I come on here I have a panic attack. I think people are watching what I do online, that almost everyone is involved in a conspiracy to drive me insane and make me kill myself. I think they may have put something in my ear and it's burrowing into my brain. My thoughts race, it's hard to control them. They start to spin out of control and I start to feel dizzy, like the world has tilted and horizontal becomes vertical. Then it's like I black out and I wake up hours later or somewhere I dont remember going. What the fuck is wrong with me? I'm afraid to go outside, I'm afraid to talk to anyone. I don't know who I can trust. I can't sleep, I don't want to eat. This pain my head keeps getting worse and worse, and I can feel something moving around in there. I'm losing control, please help me. I don't even remember writing half of this.