Insight Needed Urgently

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Breathe, Apr 12, 2010.

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  1. Breathe

    Breathe Well-Known Member

    In a few hours i will go into college and tell them i quit.
    The course only has 4 months left but i really cant do it.
    I stare at my assignments trying to bring up the commitment, the willpower to get through it but i cant. How can you when you know it wont help you in anyway? That the only thing its good for is a reference and stress.
    My tutor and councillor there will try to stop me, "only a few more months" they will say but i cant. Cant carry on. Only thing is how do i tell my parents? I havent even told them i dont want to be a paramedic and want to be in art. My father is dead set on me going into sciences, and a public service. I want to be a tattoo artist, i already make a bit of money designing tattoos for people, want to get a apprenticeship and do what i love.
    I'm a failure to my parents. Cant stand to tell them. Lying saying science course doesnt want me and might say i never got my certificate through for this course. What should i do??

    Another thing, i was recently in a car crash. Wasnt injuried just shock and i missed my car theory. Everyone was nice to me, car theory is booked free of charge and everything is fine. My parents want me to claim. I told them i didn't i mean i dont want the fuss, and i have nothing to complain about really. Everything is sorted. Now :( now they claim i was never in a car crash, that i am attention seeking, just because i dont want to claim compensation. How do i get them to understand??
  2. Breathe

    Breathe Well-Known Member

    You know what sometimes this site is fucking useless, no not sometimes, most of the time.
    Lots of people have viewed this, lots of people have been online, the chat room doesnt work for me so i cant ask there and i have been waiting for someone to help me, to get a outsiders pov.
    But no. Fine go screw yourselves.
    I needed help and i only got bystanders, noesy gawkers who just want to see what the problem is and not actually help.
  3. purplejen

    purplejen New Member

    Don't have many words just now but want you to know that ur not alone
  4. Rose24

    Rose24 Chat & Forum Buddy

    Don't quit! You said it yourself, only a few months left! What’s the point of giving up now? Go through with it and by the end of June or whenever it's done you'll feel so relieved. Education is a real way out of a shit life, it's tough now but it'll leave you better off in the future, if you leave now you might end up regretting it. There is nothing stopping you from pursuing what you really want to in future, but if that doesn’t pan out for you, you'll have this to fall back on. You're only 17, finish this course, take a year out before you apply (UCAS, I assume) I'm that year, get a job in a tattoo parlour and some weekend experience in a hospice or a care environment. At the end of the year you can choose and if you do choose healthcare and they ask you why you took a year out, just say you wanted to earn some money. Tell your parents that you need time to to think about what you’re doing, but be productive so they cant complain, show your dad that you’ve gotten yourself weekend experience and found yourself a job.

    As for the car crash, the simplest solution would be to claim compensation. You’ve got nothing to lose.
  5. Rose24

    Rose24 Chat & Forum Buddy

    The most popular thread on this page has 52 posts out of 1140 veiws, so 0.046 posts per veiw, yours has 2, excluding your own our of 39 veiws or 0.051 posts per view; not bad i think, it's only been a few hours since you put the thread up.

    Sometimes you have to remember that people dont always know what to say, or they might not have the confidance to speak up, but that doesn't mean they dont want to help.
  6. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    sorry kat this post has just popped up on my site....I'm not in the uk so maybe some of us a bit slow...
    I would urge you to sit down with your parents and tell them how you feel about everything....explain how unhappy you are about being something you dont want to be..
    maybe you can find a compromise...
    take care
  7. TheOncomingStorm

    TheOncomingStorm Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry you feel that people are just being Nosey, but maybe people don't know what to say?
    I think you should try and stick with college, but if you really dont want to be doing the course and you honestly dont think you can anylonger, then Its up to you, noone can make your mind up but yourself.
    People are always telling others to follow there dreams so if you want to be a tattoo artist, then maybe do an art course at college?

    Take care.
  8. LotusFlower

    LotusFlower Antiquities Friend

    I think you should do what makes you happy and if that is tattoos then that is what you should do. As an artist I have done lots of things, and sometimes you will have to do other things to put food on the table. But that love never really goes away.
  9. Axiom

    Axiom Account Closed

    I think it is too late now, but I would suggest finishing this term. But also, talk to your parents about you becoming a tattoo artist. It would be a really good way for everyone, if you said something in the ways of , I respect your views on wanting me to go through school and become a paramedic. Ive tried but its not something I want for myself.

    I mean explain what you want to do, and before you do that, get some research handy, like job prospects, average starting pay, apprentiships(especially ones you have been in contact), and bring some photos of what you do. Try and expalin to your parents that this is what you really enjoy doing, there is money to be made in it and you want to share your life choices with them.

    Above all, any good parent wants what is best for their children, and to make sure they have a plan and can look after themselves.

    Again, I understand its incredibly difficult for you to be doing these courses, but maybe if you had the motivation from your parents and yourself for starting an apprentiship as a tatto artist, you might find it easier to finish your studies, because there will be a real positive thing in your life, that you and your parents agree on.

    And even if they throw you out of the house and disown you, you would be living your life the way you want to.

    As long as you are safe, and securing yourself, and opening doors that you want to be, go for it.
  10. jenniferelaine

    jenniferelaine Well-Known Member

    What about taking a medical leave of absence?
  11. destroyer

    destroyer Guest

    Might I add, that being a paramedic is actually good for a tattoo artist, just in case you wished to expand your possibilities once you got into the field, get into piercing, transdermals, tongue splitting, and so on.. having that sort of credibility would allow others to feel safer in your hands. 4 months left -- four tough months, no doubt, but one day at a time and it would be over before you knew it. Good luck -- some of the best paid people I know are tattoo artists... but it takes dedication. It's a way of life.

    Take care
  12. jdcchangedme

    jdcchangedme New Member

    Take a break tell them that while you weren't physically hurt you do not seem to be able to concentrate well enough to continue for now. Then ask them what to do when you are ready to go back. There is no need to tell them you do not want to be a paramedic or anything someone else wants you to be. You are too young to be forced or even make final decisions have fun try things. I am so much older than you are and even my kids are but I wish I had done what I am suggesting. Say what they need to hear and at the same time get what you need. I know how hard it is to do something different.
  13. greencow117

    greencow117 New Member

    If I'm too late (which I seem to be), I apologise, but I haven't been on the forum that often lately, and even then I'm terrified of giving advice that leads to further problems, especially since I'm about to encourage you to leave college.

    Not that I'm trying to make this post about me, but I very recently quit my course despite the fact that I was only 3 months from completion. I also thought that the course was an exercise in futility in the exact way you said (reference and stress), and furthermore, although I loved my subject, I found their way of teaching it to be shamefully anti-intellectual. But that is irrelevant, so let me get to the point.

    I have no idea about tattoo artists, but I'll assume the earnings are sufficient to support a living (I only mention financial considerations because my own dreams of becoming a sort of philosopher poet and mathematician doesn't pay off at all). If that is the case, and you really love it, then I suggest you go for it. There is little point in wasting time and effort on something that isn't going to enrich your life; after all, you only live once (unless you believe in reincarnation I guess).

    A friend of mine advised me on this subject of dropping out and told me about this taxi driver who quit Chemical Engineering to study Shakespeare (unprofitably) and could not be happier with his life choice. Education is generally a ticket towards materialistic wealth, and though that has its perks, you probably don't want to end up in a sort of mid-life crisis where you wonder how passion was traded for mere things.

    However, though I'm sure you already fully appreciate this, I must emphasise that if you do drop out, you are reducing options, and you will have nothing to fall back on. Additionally, as destroyer points out above, having the qualification of a paramedic could be beneficial to becoming a tattoo artist. So even you are devoted to tattooing, you must also consider the practicalities of the field you're entering and do a good amount of research on it before you decide - you don't want to regret dropping out. You might also be able to take a break, ask for medical leave etc, which might give you the time you need to 'regroup', as it were. Switching to an art college might also be an option.

    As for how to talk to your parents about it - well, arguably that's even harder than deciding to drop out. Generally speaking, good parents will cave in (over time), perhaps on some condition that you prove somehow that you can support yourself. However, some parents are incredibly dogmatic, and some are downright terrible as parents. I will not presume to know how your parents are (and please forgive me if I'm wrong), but I coincidentally came across your other thread titled 'Abusive household', so I'm going to advise as though their reaction will be unfavourable.

    Naturally, you can just complete the course to please them. However, it is almost inevitable that there will come some stage in life where you simply cannot acquiesce to their every demand, thus implying confrontation. You know your parents best, so act accordingly.

    For example, my father infrequently snaps and threatens to throw me or my sister out of the house, though I can't recall exactly if he gets physical since my memory is full of holes (also I just want to state for the record that my father is a great and honourable man who has had quite an unfortunate and difficult life, and that my respect for him knows no bounds); but like I said, it's infrequent. Arguments also used to be a frequent thing in my home until I simply gave in and tried my best to prevent them. Yet to my surprise, they were quite supportive this time round. We often underestimate our parents' good intentions.

    But again, you know them best. If they are abusive, then in the long run you are going to have to get out, though 17 might be a bit of a precarious age for this kind of thing. You might have to find relatives (or anybody else you consider appropriate) to help you. You're also going to have to think of your brother - if I lived in an abusive household, I know I wouldn't want to leave my younger sister all alone.

    Alternatively, you're going to have to do your best to 'manipulate' them, if they can be so manipulated. Lie if your conscience is compatible with it (also with various reprecussions in mind). Personally, I even thought of not telling my parents at all since they might not have checked the qualifications carefully.

    That's all I can think of the moment. Sorry for the long post, but I tend to be quite verbose. Please PM me if you want to talk further.

    I hope this helped, and wish you the best of fortunes.
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