As another day passes, another thought of uselessness joins. Not a day goes by I dont ask myself the question "why am I here?". I feel like i have fell to an all time low. My dad and mom separated when I was age 1. I lived with my mom all through my life, until recently. My mom was recently put in jail for a major crime and she wont even see me graduate from high school from her sentence. My mom's "track record" was never great, and has been through about 7 guys in the past 6 years. When your parents go through a divorce, you go through a divorce. I have to live with my dad, and my dad has no reason for me and has kept that promise to him for a long time. I had to change schools systems for what my mom did. I dont have friends, im an antisocial fux up who has no other reason to live for. I picture myself dozens of time to just put a gun to my head ad pull the trigger with no regret. I have kept all these feelings to myself because there is no other reason to give it to people that do not matter to me. I wanted to just end this miserable, worthless, useless, unnecessary life like i have had it this far. I know that bullcrap about "well, we know you're thinking about it, and well you're obviously using something to live for considering you haven't committed it yet." I have nothing to live for it feels like. People around me dont seem to exist. And I feel like ive even hit rock bottom for speaking out on this.