It's pretty clear that there's something wrong with me. I'm competent enough to recognize evil, but all the recent public attacks really amaze me. Something about hurting people, physically, who are having fun and living a happy life makes me feel good about myself. It's like an addiction. I've been getting drunk at bars just looking to get in fights. I hurt someone badly and have no idea what happened to him. It is the greatest feeling of control and release of frustration I've ever experienced and I only feel alive if I'm kicking someone's teeth in. I want them to feel the pain I feel and end their happiness.