I don't feel pleasure from anything at all. Closest I ever feel to it is relief. It always seemed that normal people would be able to enjoy virtually anything, gravitating towards whatever they were best at as their main interest. Thing is on top of no pleasure from anything I do I'm not good at anything. In the past I've only ever been interested in child stuff - cartoons, toys, etc. Feels like ever since I grew up I've just had a huge void. Have been playing the MMOs since I was about 12, but they stopped being fun a long time ago and just became an addiction - the illusion of progress and the simplicity of the genre kept me going. However, now they are becoming more complex and blatantly repetitive. It's probably pointless to play at all at this point, but I chose to be addicted so I could feel like I was doing something. Without it though there's nothing at all. My mind just can never focus to actually process, comprehend, or remember anything, so there goes a whole bunch of potential things to do. Even watching TV feels like a chore because I usually don't understand what's going on. I'll still watch cartoons just because they're easy to follow. I get even less out of reading books - I can read, but don't actually absorb any of it. The words go through my head, but they have no meaning as just words. Never satisfied with anything I do either - hell, it's exhausting just going over the words in this post over and over to see if it came out right. Looking back, I'm not even sure why I wrote this... what a stupid question to ask how I can find things to enjoy when I don't even possess the capacity to enjoy. Been on a few dozen medications and had ECT. Ma pretty much convinced me to give up on medication doing a damn thing since I've been on everything at least once, so it's just hoping for some random miracle cure now while I just wait out the duration of a pointless existence.