Into The Void

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by LetItGo, May 19, 2008.

  1. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    Think i must be the most dull, boring, uninteresting person alive.

    Asked K if she thinks im boring, she said no...but...

    Trying to figure out my passions, only to find im not particularly passionate about anything, the things ive enjoyed in the past give me little satisfaction now. I cant even come up with something half baked.

    Feel like im destined to go around in circles for the rest of my days, never finding anything im trully passionate about, the one thing that really sticks. I sometimes feel people like me are consuming finate resources they have no right too, what this planet needs are passionate people, people that want to succeed as individuals will hopefully make society at large a better place.

    I have to force myself to do the things I should be interested in, the things Ive had earmarked for so long now...its not really working.

    How do you rediscover yourself? find yourself? all that apparent "new age" stuff? I lost myself a long time ago, ive never really recovered. The growth I should have had over the last decade never happened. I got lost in the depression, lost in the sadness.
  2. lostboy

    lostboy Well-Known Member

    Woah man I totally sympathise with you. I got lost in depression, and I think I fucked my development up because of it. Like you I’m trying to do the things I thought I wanted to do most, only to find… I cant really be arsed :p. I really don’t really know how to change either… If I find out I’ll let you in on it :D.
    I’ve bought a bunch of books on motivation and stuff, but I don’t really think I’ll find an answer in a book…
    Guess till then we’ll just have to do our best.
  3. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    I spend 8 hours a day at work, thinking the entire time all I wanna do is work on my own stuff when i get home. I find myself tuning out 5 minutes after I start.

    Ive put myself in a place, 2 or 3 times, where I thought I could force myself to find a true love and stick with it. I quit my job/s. I found myself miserable, bored, unemployed and drinking for 6 months. I didnt "discover myself". I just woke up, ate, shit, watched tv, drank, sat on computer, went to bed.

    I know at least one thing thats always stopped me from pushing forward. The very fatalistic view I have on life. A view I still have.
  4. Fishman

    Fishman Guest

    hmm sounds a lot like me as well.
  5. Shauna Lea

    Shauna Lea Staff Alumni

    Matt, I think you need to open your mind a bit more. Try doing some things you usually wouldn't, even if you don't think you will like them - you might surprise yourself!