Hello, I don't know how to begin all this. My english is bad too which makes it even harder. Well, I am not a new member. I've been here on and off since 2005 (not much in last few years). This just shows how big loser I am since never changed in my life in all these years. I've never lived normal life. Everyone around me seems like having that life routine: school, job, wife, kids etc. Its all been a big struggle for me. Its just like this world is not made for me. I am completely unable to get a job even with a college degree I have. Economic situation is though in this shitty country, and for weirdos like me its like mission impossible. I do have bunch of interests in my life, I am not bored but I am spending most of time by myself. Every day is same, no change. I am not even depressed or suicidal no more, I do know I will end up killing myself tho. I already would have done that if it wasn't for my mother. So, I am just looking someone to talk to. I am not much interesting person. If you got nothing more useful to do you can give me a chance. If you leave me I will not mind, I didn't keep any internet "friends" anyways, they would leave sooner or later. I don't blame them, for sure. It was like normal thing. I don't even believe in making online friendships. I had good friends in real life which I have lost due to my depression and egocentric personality.