Hi, My name is Steven, I’m 19 and I’m here because I feel I have nowhere else to go. After a lifetime of bullying and being let down I finally cracked when I was 16. Ever since then my emotions have been bleeding out of me, through tears and blood. I feel worthless all of the time. I despise myself. At first it was just the depression, nothing else. Then I started bouncing between the extremes. One hour I would be normal, doing homework or something else. Then, as if someone flicked a switch, I would get depressed or hyper. It is really scaring me because it feels like I’m some sort of madman. This usually happens a few times a day to a few times a week. I can’t control anything of what I feel anymore. I know I need help. Time after time I turn to the blade for answers rather than the doctor. But I can’t get the courage to drag myself out of the gutter to see anyone. Whenever I think about it I just freeze up and want to bleed more. I need to end the pain because every time my mood switches I can feel myself coming closer and closer to a complete meltdown and I can’t take it anymore. I get told I'm overreacting a lot. I get ignored. I get pushed to the back every time. The more I go through this, the more I remember I have no-one at all. I’m screaming, with a world where it seems like no-one in the world gives a damn.