I'm tired and invisible - until something goes wrong or stops working. I just want to be done. I want to be finished. That is better than being forgotten. No need to feign interest that isn't there. Just let me go...I'm done with all the futile effort and the pretense of friendships/relationships that are nothing but a means of luring me in; just another opportunity to slap me upside the face and prove yet again people will let me down. I've learned that lesson. Over and over and over again. Can't let me down any more. I don't believe you will be there to begin with. Just want to be dead. No games. No rules. No hoops. Just done.