I'm so irritable. I was just linking thoughts from my past. I was listening to Jimi Hendrix, and I was only appreciating it fully for the first time. I had friends back in middle school who were into that music. So I started thinking about this guy who I hung out with a little bit, but didn't become great friends with. Then, I thought about how someone I knew, I can't remember who, it was like a year or two ago, knew the guy somehow, through high school or college or something, and she thought he was cool. And then I thought about how I've been nearly invisible, should have been friends with the right people. "Should have." Bad words. And I'm twenty. And I fukd up. You can't fk up worse than me. I'm not in college. And I was such a fked up kid. So it makes sense. You worry about everything, then you fk everything up without noticing what you're supposed to notice. That's the best way I can put it right now.