is anyone locked away and alone?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by darkrider, Jan 21, 2009.

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  1. darkrider

    darkrider Well-Known Member

    anyone locked away and alone?

    For the past few years all i've known is my room, the house I live in with my parents, and the same old streets i've always walked. It goes without saying I feel totally isolated and trapped. I'm 20 years old, when I should be having the time of my life i'm a hermit, a recluse, i'm not quite scared of going outside but I don't know what to go outside for, and when I do I feel disconnected. I'm so confused and lost. Without direction. A brain with no mind. Is it me or has everyone read a script for life I wasn't given? I can't go and get a basic job, it's hard to know where to start. I don't have the will to pass their interviews. I've got no friends to see. I've got nothing to work towards. I've seen nothing of the world. Felt nothing back. I hardly feel any positive emotions now. What is going on? What the hell is wrong with me, why can't I function like a normal human being? I don't want to be like this.. i've never done anything wrong in my life. All i've ever done is try to do whats right. Am I destined to stay alone until I drive myself to the verge of insanity and everything is gone? I feel everything has built up like a wave. I BADLY need some kind of release but I don't know where it's going to come from, if it ever does, apart from my own hand. Oh well i've gone on long enough. I don't know what else to say.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 21, 2009
  2. Øyvind

    Øyvind Senior Member

  3. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    Hi mate, sorry you are feeling so alone. Is it the feeling of being disconected that keeps you indoors or are there other reasons as well? S.
     
  4. darkrider

    darkrider Well-Known Member

    Hi, quite possibly. I honestly don't know how better to explain my feelings. It's like I know I should be getting out, being proactive, looking for jobs. But I don't. One part of it is fear, the rest I just feel disconnected, not in a state of reality I guess. I really need to grow up somehow.
     
  5. snowraven

    snowraven Well-Known Member

    I'm 51 and have had that disconnected feeling for a long time. You are certainly not alone in that. The only people I really get along with are the people I go climbing with and I've known most of them for about 30 years. Even then there is only one of them who I can talk to about how I am feeling and that's only because he has been through a bout of depression himself. Don't worry about feeling so disconnected from most people. Try and find something that you enjoy doing and hopefully you will find someone you can connect with. I go to the mountains to do it because climbing puts me on the edge and is one of the few things that makes me feel alive. It also keeps me away from the majority of people. Sometimes we can go out into the hills for a week and not see another person. Hope you can find something similar my friend. Best wishes Simon.
     
  6. Lennie

    Lennie Well-Known Member

    I've become increasingly isolated from the world around me. I'm lucky enough to have good friends and family, but I feel like I'm pushing them all away. I'm not sure if I'm doing this purposely or not for some reasons I won't go into right now.

    I should feel lucky and it should be enough for me to get back on track again, but I don't and it's not. I want to get back out there, I can feel it within me, but I just don't have the strength anymore.

    I want to get a job, that would be a start and get me out of the house and out of my room, but like you mentioned about interviews, I just know that they will see right through me. I can't seem to hide it anymore.
     
  7. Lennymum

    Lennymum New Member

    My son feels locked away and alone, his confidence is zero and has no self esteem, but if you knew him you would see him as a handsome, charming, whitty, clever, caring, sensitive, very warm hearted and sensitive genuine person .

    You would find it a real pleasure to know him and feel luckyto be able to spend time with him.

    I wish he could see what I see then he would start living his life for him and not for others.

    He is very special! He just needs to realise it!!
     
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