Is anyone's source of abuse an older sibling?

[Sugar Mountain]

I grew up with what I always felt was a very unique situation and have always been curious if anyone else has had this sort of experience.

The source of my emotional and physical abuse was not from my parents, but my oldest brother (6 years older).

It seems odd because you would think the parents would put a stop to it, but he was a very scary person and I think my parents were glad when they weren't the ones being abused because he emotionally abused my dad and sometimes physically abused my mom.

This wasn't typical "older brother abuse." This was threats to be killed in your sleep, guns pointed at you, personal effects destroyed, etc.

Anyway, just wondering if anyone else had a similar experience.

 

[~CazzaAngel~]

Well.. mine was and some still are is my step father, mother, aunt... then there were more abusers, but those are the ones who were more like family.

 

[letdown]

My girlfriend went through a very similar thing with her older brother.

 

[Sugar Mountain]

My girlfriend went through a very similar thing with her older brother.

Can you tell me about it? I am curious to hear someone else's experience.

 

[letdown]

I don't know. I feel a bit uncomfortable going into the ins-and-outs of her private stuff. I hope you understand. :smile:

How is your brother now though? Is he getting any help? Are you getting any help from the after effects of this? :hug:

 

[Sugar Mountain]

I have not talked to my brother since 1995. It sounds harsh, but I have no desire for him in my life. He was an awful, awful person and I seriosuly doubt he has changed at all.

I went to therapy for a few years. Saw many different therapists and finally found one I liked, but she was very expensive and I ran up my credit cards going to her until I could not go anymore.

 

[Jackson]

I know someone who was the youngest of 3 brothers. His two brothers would have their friends over and get him(the youngest bro) to perform oral sex and the like on the friends. He craved the approval, attention, love of his older brothers so he didn't know it was wrong.

 

[SmilePretty]

my brother beats the shit out of me sometimes. PM me if you want to talk :smile:

 

[meh__]

i know what you're going through.. though my brother was a year younger but alottt bigger. my parents didnt do anything also because they were terrified because he did alot of hard drugs and would like change into a different person and beat the shit out of me more than once daily..he too threatened my life and held a knife to my throat.. it escalated and i had severe injuries and was unsafe in my house so i was hospitalized..eventually my brother changed when he stopped using drugs but i still live in fear of him and didnt talk to him for months at a time but at this moment it seems as if he has changed and hopefully it stays how it is..i think it would be good if you talked to someone about whats happening like a counsellor or whoever..i know how terrible it feels to have to go through this

xxx

 

[savetoniqht]

my brothers been like this for years but i never thought of it as anything more than like typical sibling rivalry. I didn't really think siblings could be abusive, but he's just unbearable. I don't know if you can really count is as abuse because i dont know what really makes it abuse, but its definitely more than just a sibling relationship.. he's worse than any of my friends siblings and worse than any of my other siblings. He beats the shit out of me all the time and he takes everything out on me.. its nearly impossible to live with and i plan on never communicating again once he leaves.