Is it now?

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Soulless Angel, Dec 31, 2009.

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  1. Is it now?

    Is now the right time?

    Im one of those people who wont plan it, it will just happen. Everyone will be left wondering. The straw that broke the camels back. One last thing will tip me over the edge and that will be that.

    Tonight is not a good night.

    But is it now? I doubt it cause im coming down now.

    Please GOD help me live through this.
  2. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    Do you need to talk? you can talk to me about what it is that's making you feel this way. I'm here for you :hug:
  3. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    I am here too if you need someone we are here for you...get that crap out of your head and post away we are listening and we all care even if lots of people don't reply know that we all care and may not know what to say...I wish I knew what words to impart to you but maybe if you share a bit more about what you are going through I can help more.
    I am here ,,,you are not alone you have all of us.
  4. Your posts have brought a tear. I thought maybe I was that worthless that even on here I couldnt find a friend. I self harm and have done since I was 3 and i suffer with depression and anxiety. There are good days and bad days like there are for everyone, im sure. At the moment, im not good. My 3 kids are all that keep me alive and sometimes im not even sure thats enough. Im scared that one day ill go so wild and give in. I almost did last night. I stood in the kitchen in the dark alone, staring into the knife drawer, willing myself. Willing myself to be brave. Thats how I see it, bravery. It takes a brave person. Im not even sure im that brave.
    I dont have the right to ask you all for help, you all have ur own concerns and ur own stresses and I dont want to add to those or impact on those.
    Im just lost. I dont know which way to turn. I have no one to turn too. No one cares. People are starting to guess there is something wrong. I think im covering it well. The looks will start soon. They will check slyly for the marks, proof of there thoughts.
    He is watching me now, amidst his lies he accuses me. Accuses me. You wonder why i want to die. Look athim.
  5. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    Are you getting any kind of professional help for this? please seek help, don't try to deal with all this on your own, it's clearly taking its toll on you.

    keep talking to us, we understand how you feel and can offer you support.

    you'll always have a friend here :)
  6. Im not getting any help. Noy sure where to go. Have had help previously.

    Tell me ur story, id feel better if i could help someone else.
  7. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    Try to find a councellor, someone you can talk to so you're not bottling things up and trying to deal with them alone. It can help a lot. Go to your doctor, maybe you also need medication and that.

    In the meantime it helps to express yourself on here, as I already said :)

    Oh just too long to go into. And made up of too many things.
  8. Talk to me about you. We can help each other, maybe just share a bit.....
  9. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    Okay well at the moment I'm overwhelmed with guilt of something that I done to someone I supposedly love. I lied and it had horrible consequences for him and his family. He was even talking about suicide, and I just feel horrible at the moment. now I can never speak to him again, and I've cause him and his family so much pain and I feel like the biggest bitch alive for it.

    Apart from that my own life is fucked. I have no friends, I suffer from depression and anxiety, I haven't achieved anything, I am a failure. I don't go out and socialise because i am too scared. And I have no friends to do that with anyway. I'm horribly lonely and everyday it gets to me more and more. I hate myself physically and mentally. I'm sick of being hurt by people who say they care. I just want to end my life now, I have nothing to lvie for, nothing I want to live for.

    Nothing ever goes right for me and every good thing I get, gets taken away.
    My hopes are always crushed and I'm sick of getting back up to fight it.
  10. The fact that you recognise you did wrong means your not a bad person. We all do bad things, sometimes real bad things. Its how we learn in life.
    You need help, but you have to ask for it and only if you want it. Sometimes you dont want to be helped and thats fine too. No one can force you. But if there is just a small snippet of a cry for help, act on it. Its a sign that you want to see the better things in life.
  11. Colourful

    Colourful Well-Known Member

    I know I can get help...and I do want it, if I choose to live then obviously I'll get the help.
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