is it really It is better to have loved and lost, than not to love all all.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ZundertowZ, May 5, 2008.

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  1. ZundertowZ

    ZundertowZ Well-Known Member

    i personally have come 2 beilieve this quote is bulllshit! i have had 2 long term relationships one 5 years and one ten, and both ended with being disappointed and realizing i never really knew who these girls were. all of the good times were destroyed by the frauds people are exposed 2 be. every person i ever loved girlfriends, friends, ad family have eventually left me in a disturbingly hurtfull and selfish way. how do u separate the goodtimes from the hurfull endings. i am all alone know no friends, family our girlfriend and dont ever think i can have any sort of meeningfull relationship again!
  2. nolove89

    nolove89 Active Member

    So having tons of sex isn't good enough?
  3. almosteasy

    almosteasy Well-Known Member

    Sometimes you get to a point in life where nothing has any meaning. Yes even tons of sex. And even tons of sex with hot women.
  4. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    i can't believe people still think sex is a cure all, this post isnt about sex.

    seperating the good times from the bad endings is always hard coz of how you feel, the hurt and pain always overides all else and you dont want to look back.
    but looking back doent help mate, you got to try and look forward to what can be, this experiance can easily sour anything else that happens next, who ever comes along.

    now is the time to concentrate on yourself 1 day at a time

    a broken heart can be the worst pain
  5. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    Jeez, just listen to any pop song! Better yet, listen to the blues. I think it helps to remember the good times. I look back at my relationships, and can weed out the good ones from the bad. There are good friends/lovers who are imperfect, (but who isn't?) and then there are friends/lovers who are mostly bad, but you couldn't catch it at the beginning.

    Sometimes relationships fall apart due to personal differences, and sometimes they are bad right from the get-go. But the bottom line is they fulfill you, whether they're sexual, platonic, or emotional. Although these days, since I've had my fill, I wonder if I'm better off alone. Overall, I'd say yes, it's better to have loved. And it doesn't have to be a lover, it can be a friend. Jeez, it can even be a pet!
  6. ThoseEmptyWalls

    ThoseEmptyWalls Well-Known Member

    If lifes not beautiful without the pain then Id just ruther never see beauty again....
  7. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    "Is it better to have loved and lost....."

  8. Gunner12

    Gunner12 Well-Known Member

    I think it all depends on the person.

    If it's a deep relationship lost, then the phrase is definately not true.

    Relationships can come an go. Keep trying and being who you are, someone will come to you.
  9. I miss my exes from February 2007 and June-October 2007, although I realize that if it was meant to be, it would be.
  10. XXXXX

    XXXXX Antiquities Friend

    Honestly never been that overly fussed in past relationships - Looking back I seem to have deliberately never gone into relationships with anyone who I thought would end up as a very longterm thing.....I guess the idea being if you start off knowing the ending then easy to deal with.

    One time I lived with a Woman for 3 months - without knowing her name :blink:....strangely that ain't as hard as it seems, just that after a week or 2 it is kinda hard to ask....and time just to seems to then slip by. She weren't best pleased when she found out (IME women are funny like that :laugh:). But she didn't end I said, the trick was to pick women who I would never be with longterm - and even an idiot would never stay with a woman long term who would put up with a fella who lived with her for 3 months without knowing her name.

    For better or worse

    Kinda how I got mixed up the Missus.....typical going nowhere relationship - except she was well aware and wanted as well..........took about 6 years of on, off and sideways (and a lot of craziness :tongue:) to get seriously involved and both of us were surpised we had a) done so with anyone and b) done so with each other!.......but I think it was a lot to do with age, not so much growing up, but more getting tired of craziness - with a capital Z :blink:

    For richer or poorer

    After a couple of years ended up getting married (a lot of dithering along the way to get their!) - 1st anniversary next week 17 May :cool: didn't think a bit of paper would change already decided (or simply accepted?!!) that we were stuck with each other forever come what may.......but I found the bit of paper with the word "married" on actually changes a LOT! in yer head - must be some primeval caveman / woman type stuff going on or something??......she used to grin like a cheshire cat when using the name Mrs XXXXXX.....and then be kinda embarrased about doing so :biggrin:

    In sickness and in Health

    The Missus had a few health concerns, nothing "serious" on their own - but at 37 she weren't no spring chicken anymore and a lifetime of burning the Candle at both ends......she was going through various checks and a bit of treatment - but were very happy she had got an all clear on a Cancer scare.

    Me Brother got rushed into the Hospital back in Oct 07 (Never answer the telephone gone 1am - rarely going to be good news :sad:).....with the news that "if 5 minutes away a good idea to come now"......but I was in a different Country.....I went to see him......missed him by an hour or so.......:mad:

    Till death us do part

    Stayed around for family related stuff - figured a few weeks would do no harm.........of course get another call "if 5 minutes away a good idea to come now"......but I was in a different Country.....I went to see her......missed her by an hour or so.......:mad: 4 Nov 2007.

    Better to have loved and lost?.........Yes!, 100% for sure :cool: - but this does not mean it is all "Good stuff" During or after. It ain't like in the movies.......

    And of course the irony is that I am still here - not to say the Missus never had her self destructive times......we had a lot of sh#t in common.....and in many respects a major miracle she survived to 37....with me it's only a minor miracle...........
  11. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    Its nice to feel the love at least once in your life. Its wonderfull to be loved and to love. Nothing lasts forever, but at least... Memories will stay... forever

  12. Some memories are very painful and aren't worth ever having, considering the intense pain which they can cause.
  13. liveinhope

    liveinhope Well-Known Member

    I loved and then lost:sad: is it better to have known that kind of intense depth of emotion, for me yes, but the sorrow of loosing someone especially in tragic circumstances makes it difficult to see what was, becouse we often focus on what if!!!!

    But yes
  14. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    I know, im talking about nice memories from the time when you were loved.
  15. liveinhope

    liveinhope Well-Known Member

    I know hun it is better to have had than to have never known it hugs
  16. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    Yeah, i would gave up from all my life and from everything what I have for just one day with love. And then Ill spend the rest of my life with the memories of that one day.
  17. It is better to be hugged than to never have been hugged at all. :hug: for all.
  18. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    How much I need a real hug, not just a hug on the screen. Its not the same, but probably this is all I have, and this is all I will ever have.

  19. I hope that you will have real hugs soon. Until then... :hug: :hug:
  20. touglytobeloved

    touglytobeloved Well-Known Member

    I wish the same for you, and not only you, I wish that for everyone who needs a hug.

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