I have had things going round in my head for a while. Before I had daily urges that I wanted to commit suicide. I never tried to but the real urge was there. However recently things have been going a little bit better for me. But I still get the odd urge to kill myself. So I am thinking that maybe it's not such a bad thing if I did. Maybe it's what my body and mind want and no amount of medication or therapy can help. One day I think I will decide to follow the urge and then I think I will be at ease.