Is it safe to talk?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Miss Invisible, Feb 14, 2015.

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  1. Miss Invisible

    Miss Invisible Active Member

    In three days I have an assessment for therapy and maybe meds, I am so scared to go. I've tried for the past 9 months to make it to an appointment but every time my anxiety wins. I NEED to go, this I know, but I don't know if I can trust someone with my deepest pains and not feel they will turn around and hurt me back. I guess in therapy talk I'm saying I'm scared if I am completely open with the therapist, I'm scared I will be hospitalized. I fear being labeled and I fear losing my family or the hopes of a good job because I shared my pain. The most sharing I've done has been this forum I found as of yesterday. I'm battling my anxiety right now, telling myself if I want to live I have to go but so far my anxiety is winning. All I want is to feel safe talking about my problems, I just don't know if that is an option.

    Advice/support is welcome.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi miss invisible. Nice to meet you.

    I have a lot of experience with the mental health system. If you have a plan and a date set for suicide they will hospitalize you. Otherwise you will just get treated for the issues you have. They don't like to label people as such anymore, I had to ask them my diagnosis. I have been hospitalized numerous times, and it was not scary, it helped me, other times it didn't but I think it's worth a shot (pun not intended). Be honest and then you will be on the road to recovery! That is the only way to recovery. If you keep bottling it all up, you will get worse and worse. Honesty is the best policy when it comes to your mental health!

    Best of luck to you.
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 14, 2015
  3. Miss Invisible

    Miss Invisible Active Member

    Hi Petal,
    Thanks for the advice. I don't have a plan or date, just daily thoughts that I don't act on. I cannot say I haven't ever attempted but it has been over a year. I am worried because I relapsed with cutting. I stopped myself from going further by getting someone to stay with me so I wasn't alone. I feel really bad about that and worry that if I mention this it will mean hospitalization and my anxiety level with thinking of that pushes me away from feeling I can go to the appointment and feel safe. I have alot of past trauma that I want to work through but I'm still feeling scared. Thanks for your reply, I appreciate it.
  4. betteroffunknown

    betteroffunknown Well-Known Member

    Hi! And welcome to SF!

    I would say it's definitely safe to speak up! There's absolutely nothing wrong with having thoughts or feelings; it's how we decide to act on them that matters the most. Being as you have no plan or date I totally believe you're safe to speak up and share whatever is on your mind. In fact, I would strongly encourage it! Let the healing begin!!

    I just got back into therapy myself after having been out of it for a few years. It began by getting an assessment, too. The assessment went really well, and they'll simply use that time to help them figure out what services might be most helpful for you. In my case I was able to make it clear to them what I was looking for. I wasn't looking for meds, and wanted a therapist with a particular approach. They don't make any diagnosis' during the assessment; they simply make observations. The person doing the assessment in my case didn't come off as threatening at all; it felt like a safe environment to speak up. Hope having shared this helps.

    Trusting yours will go well, too, providing you choose to go through with it this time, and I hope you do!!!

    All the best!
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    You are welcome hun, i'm sorry I don't know how I missed your reply earlier.

    From what you have wrote and feel, I don't believe they will hospitalize you but treat you as an outpatient. I understand your worries though. We have a self harm section on this forum too which may be of help to you. Have you ever been hospitalized? It's not that bad and you can actually meet people like yourself and make friends. I think you are safe to talk to them about your feelings as you don't have a plan/ date set in place. Best of luck to you. Do what you feel is best and I hope you get all the help that you need.

    Kind regards,

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