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Is it silly...?

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by fpl, May 29, 2009.

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  1. fpl

    fpl Member


    Do you guys think that its silly wanting to die because loveache?

    I know, everybody says "Time will help you", but in my case I have to see everyday the woman I´ve been with during 1 year, with another guy at work.

    I feel guilty because I broke up with her. 3 weeks later I told her I wanted her back very much. She accepted me back, but during that time she got real close to him. Said she love me very much, marriage, kids, we made love several times, but never told him to stay way from her. He was always close to her. I did everything I could for her after she accepted me back. I love her very much. But, after one month she dumped me very harshly and got with him. :( No I have to see them both everyday!

    I feel I die a bit everyday. I just can´t stand this anymore. I have no way to get another job. I just keep wishing I wake up dead or being killed by some criminals. I can´t stand no more...! It hurts to much.

    I´m guilty of all of this. I love her very much. I had reasons to break up, but I should have never do it. She was crazy for me but in 3 weeks she get´s too close from another guy...! Don´t know what to think.

    I simply can´t kill myself, because of the way my family, friends and HER would think about me after that. I pray for a natural death, or for some other way of dying.

    I can´t take this anymore...
  2. fpl

    fpl Member

    I guess it should be silly! No one answers my thread...:(
  3. Denial87

    Denial87 Member

    I'm sorry for what you are going through right now. I bet many of us here know from personal experience that love hurts. My advise would be to get another job, but you write it is not an option. I don't really know what else to do. :sad: I'm sorry I can't help you.
  4. Remedy

    Remedy Chat & Forum Buddy

    No matter what it is if it's causing you pain it's not silly. Though eventually you will fall for someone else, so it's no reason to end your life. I understand it's hard for you at the moment but please hang in there. There are plenty of people you could be as happy with, you just need to find them. :hug:
  5. tendenCs_89

    tendenCs_89 Well-Known Member

    Trust me on this, you should never try and justify the reasons as to why you feel so bad to yourself, you just need to accept the way you feel and work at trying to feel better.

    SOOOO many people wanna kill themeselves over heartache, its not that uncommon.
  6. Aurora Gory Alice

    Aurora Gory Alice Well-Known Member

    I can understand how heartache can make you want to kill yourself. I've never really truly been in love but it must be all consuming and such an overwhelming feeling that it'd be difficult to come back from.
    But all I can say is, killing yourself is not worth it... but it is especially not worth it over somebody else.

    You're right, people do always say time is a healer and at first you think they're talking a load of crap, but they're right. Time heals all wounds, maybe not completely but enough for you to hopefully move on up and up.
    I know my words won't mean much, but give time a chance first.

    And maybe do whatever you can to get another job or move to another department or whatever. Or at least maybe say to her 'don't you think this is about unfair, having you rubbing it in my face?' Maybe then her and this guy will try to keep a distance so you don't have to see them everyday.
  7. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    It's definitely a probelm having to see them everyday, but you will get over this. It takes a lot of time. Send me a pm if you want to.
  8. jetsabel

    jetsabel Member

    I don't think it's silly. One of my biggest problems is a heartache, too. I know how you feel :/ And I'm sorry you have to go through this. Sometimes I wish we'd never fall in love in the first time. Uh.
    If you need to talk, feel free to PM me. My english sucks but I think we could talk.
    Be okay.
  9. Leecy

    Leecy Member

    I remember you telling me about this on my post about my husband.

    And I hope its not silly to feel like you do because I am exactly the same, and every day its so very hard to live.

    For me it has been 6 months and even though I dont see every day I am constantly reminded, when I see things on TV, I hear songs, I walk past a new restaurant I'd like to go to, even when I have a tough day at work I think how much I am looking forward to going home with him and then I realise he isnt there and how much he hurt me.

    Everytime I see a man playing with their children Im reminded how I wanted that with him and now because of my age I will probably have it with no one.

    I hate the fact that he has managed to so easily find another woman who somehow is happy to move in with him despite what he did to me. How can she love someone who treated me like he did, I just didnt deserve it, and now it will take me years to ever let someone get that close to me again.

    I dont know what advice to give, the way Im feeling Im not the best person to be offering it
  10. BriGuy

    BriGuy Antiquities Friend

    Nothing that makes you hurt is silly! I have many issues going on right now, but ONE of them is heartbreak... and somedays I want to die too... and that is part of the reason I want to.

    But no matter what, it's NOT silly. It's your pain, and it will hurt for awhile!! But you can continue to fight... just like the rest of us! Fight to live... I fight every day... hour by hour... and I have to believe... that it WILL get better!
  11. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    There is no way around seeing them together everyday? I would imagine that would be devastating, just waiting for an explosion.
    I saw my ex in bed with my roomate/bandmate/close friend. I went completely numb. This was somewhat over a year ago, and I'm still not over it. They are broken up now, but through stupid internet sites like facebook I would be compelled to extend my misery and watch their conversations and feel that same heartbreak again, again, and again.
    It is definitely not silly to have such pain over a breakup. But there is something more to it when heartbreak turns into suicidal feelings. My parents just got divorced after 20+ years of marriage. My Dad was heartbroken, not suicidal. Maybe that is not a good example. But what I'm trying to say is that heartbreak that turns into feelings such extreme as to lead to suicidal tendencies usually masks deeper hurts. My opinion is that these hurts come from childhood, but I don't know your story, so I won't make any judgements.
    My suggestion would be to get a therapist or counselor to help you through these feelings and possibly find out if there is something more to your hurt than the break up. That it might be masking some greater hurt. Granted anyone with the situation your in would be hurting very much, but the addition of suicidal feelings is something that you might want to look at deeper, and that might go beyond this heartbreak that you're experiencing.

    I'm sorry you're hurting so much. I've been there, am still there in many ways, and many of us here have been through devastating heartbreak like you're describing. You're definitely not alone in your feelings, and your experience of heartbreak and pain is NOT silly. :hug:
  12. jjjoooggg2

    jjjoooggg2 Well-Known Member

    Never had an ex at work with another guy. Sounds awkward. I think I can understand even though I haven't been there. Is changing jobs out of the question?
  13. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    No it's not silly.. You are going thru the greif stage right now.. I went back to my ex six times trying to make it work and she cheated on me everytime..I have a daughter thats why I tried so hard to make it work.. It's been over twenty years since we broke up for good and I still have certain feelings for her because she is my daughters mother..I agree with I Love You that you should see a therapist so you can find closure and to learn coping skills..
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