I've got this tiny little scar about a centimeter long on the heel of my left hand. I let something sharp get the best of my control, and now it is there as a reminder. Somehow, i'm wondering how that is a bad thing. I know the way I am thinking is wrong, but I seem to have little else to turn to. Everything happy is short term. No matter what I do or where I am... there is always this gaping hole of emotionless void. One day, I let my mind control my sculpting. My subconscious mind. I wasn't really paying attention, I was just thinking about life in general. Sure it was about 1 in the morning on a school night, but I don't think I had had a bad enough day to keep me from sleep. I just needed to sculpt. I looked down at it after a while.... and sobbed. I couldn't believe something like that came from me. That my subconscious could yield something so terrible. What I understood it to be was a mother kneeling, half laying on a tree stump, next to a grave. I don't understand myself. How can I be so discontent, no matter what? How can I be so dark? How could I possibly be this empty all of the time?