is there a name for this?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Umbrella, Sep 12, 2009.

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  1. Umbrella

    Umbrella Member

    First of all, I don't know where this should go, because it's not a disorder, just a state of mind. It's sort of my philosophy on why I don't commit suicide.

    Ok. I see the universe as a vast place, where a single person.. a whole race of people.. a whole planet, even, as being extremely insignificant. I could explain this further, but it's a simple concept.

    that being said, i see myself dying affecting very little, just the people around me and then the people around them are affected by the people affected by me. So it does affect a lot of people, but not by a lot after a little while. yea, yea, butterfly effect and all that shit.

    still, none of this matters. Nothing matters. Society is just a hierarchy of people all scrambling to show off to their friends and people trying to get laid. Our governments are a bunch of corrupt officials who juggle trying to keep society balanced while getting what they want done by using their power.

    So i see all this, and then i see the easy way out of this redundant shit, which is suicide or maybe drugs\alcohol or something to not have to deal with the system. I think even crime would be easier than trying to do well in school and work your way up a corporate chain, or trying to start your own business.

    Money would be nice to have, but it just fuels the rat race. Suicide is the easiest way out, you never have to deal with anything again.

    But.. I don't really know why, but i probably won't commit suicide. At least not yet. I'm living right now just for the hell of it. I want to see what I can do in this world. Just filling the common 'earthly' desires is fun enough. Seeing how far i can get mentally is rewarding too.

    So i guess in a nutshell, my philosophy on life is..

    Do what you want, because you want to do it, and for no other reason. Just keep in mind that you are insignificant, and your life doesn't matter any more than anybody else's.

    Other people don't matter, not at all. But, using my philosophy, you would treat them like any other person would treat them, because if you don't, there will be consequences, either them not liking you, leading to other people not liking you, or you going to jail for a criminal act. both of these are things you probably don't want.

    or, using my format; "stay out of jail because it beats the alternative"

    But still, If I ever get bored of life or things get too hard for me to want to wait them out, I will kill myself without hesitation.

    PLEASE, tell me your thoughts on why I'm wrong, because I'm almost sure i have at least a few logical flaws.

    ADMINS please move this somewhere more appropriate, if you see fit.
  2. Angelo_91

    Angelo_91 Well-Known Member

    You seem to be cynical. Vent/Tell us what made you think like this, because somewhere down the line your thoughts must have changed to what they are now.
  3. jeannate

    jeannate Active Member

    I will admit, in the entire scheme of things, humans seem to be of little consequence. However, I don't hang around to see what's next. I know what is next for certain, my constant back pain, joint pain, feeling hopeless and useless. Some days are better than others, but usually I suffer from at least one or all of these pains, both physical and emotional. But I am not meaningless or worthless to others. I have those who rely on me, love me, need me. And maybe we as humans are all insignificant in the universe, to those who need me and love me they don't see me as insignificant nor do I see them as insignificant. I don't know what my place is and importance is in this universe. I don't worry about things I have no control over. If I commit suicide, I hurt some people I love very much. They are not insignificant to me. I use that as a reason to continue living. But it is very hard for me, I will admit. The pain gets so awful, so unbearable, that I don't want to suffer anymore. But so far, thinking of others has helped me. It has stopped me from committing suicide. I feel very alone because only I know how bad I feel and how much I can tolerate. People will give you motivating ideas and things like that, and it seems so easy to them just to get out of that feeling. But it is a terrible pain, you feel hopeless, useless, and endless. But even though those who I love and who love me don't get it, I don't want to hurt them by doing it, if I can avoid it.
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