Is there a reason to live??

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by june54, Jan 17, 2015.

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  1. june54

    june54 Member

    I am having a problem at the moment to want to be alive.

    Although I am under care of my NHS Mental Health Team I am
    not good at explaining myself when in a consultation.
    I don't have a valid reason to be alive when a 9yr old member of my family
    is about to go under a 12hr operation to give a little more quality of life
    and I have a few suicidal attempts which are not understood or accepted.

    There is a lot of sad history about this time including my mum who we
    lost nearly nine years ago and I still haven't gotten over her death. My dad is
    nearly 86 and I KNOW when I lose him my life WILL end but at the moment
    I am trying to hang in there for him

    I don't think I can hold on any longer but don't want to give people more
    grief for me needlessly, when they have so much on their plate anyway

    I believe it is my way of leaving life because I can't face the future which is really empty
    for me anyway

    just feel so sad and wonder when life will end
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi June...
    As they say it's about the road you've taken it's about getting there. You CAN over come these suicidal feelings, I think you should write out how you feel for your mental health team as they would understand you better then. You are certainly not alone in this. :hug:

    I hope your 9 y/o family member gets on well and heals!
  3. Freya

    Freya Loves SF Staff Member ADMIN

    Hi June,

    I understand completely the struggle to make yourself heard/understood in a consultation - the best thing I have found to communicate properly is to write when I feel especially overwhelmed or bad and to simply hand that over rather than try to explain verbally to someone. Hopefully if the mental health team can get a clearer picture of where you are 'at' they will be able to formulate a better care plan.

    I hope that your family member makes it through the operation and that it is a success - the fact that they are undergoing surgery etc does not have any bearing on your right to a good life however. Giving up on yourself is not going to make their life any better.

    Take care and stay safe.
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