I'm sure I'm not alone in this where you feel/know that your life is incredibly crappy, everyone else around you has a much better life than you, you cannot imagine suffering like this for many more years in your future and you want to end it. And yet you can't, your afraid of doing it, ending up with a failed attempt, what happens after you die, etc. Your stuck in your life and you feel so hopeless and frustrated. My dad decided to remind me today how shitty my life is, how pathetic I am (thanks a lot! :dry but it is the hurtful truth that I keep ignoring but inevitably, I'll always be reminded of it, I can't run away from it forever. How can I avoid the fact I have no friends, no social life, barely go out of the house, that I do the exact opposite things everyone else my age does, they enjoy life, I wish that I wasn't ever born. I feel so pathetic with all this self-hating. I've been very isolated for much of my life, very introverted, missed out on all the experiences everyone else has gone through, lack knowledge of many things that are so easy for others. And then I feel like I am 21, but yet so far behind developmentally, and I don't have the drive to catch up with everyone since I'm so far behind, so far behind that I should just give up and end my life? I'm not ready for the real world when I should have been years ago. I'm the baby bird all grown up but still in the mother's nest, where my peers flew out on their own a long while back. Its going to be very painful in my near future. And yet I'm very afraid to kill myself, I only think about it, haven't attempted, I'd probably fail anyways or if I succeed, go into hell anyways, my life can certainly get worse can't it? I just feel so stuck, that there's no way out, maybe there is a way out but I can't see it due to this cloud of depression and self-loathing and apathy. I have such a pathetic life and it sucks that even if I start improving myself now, I'll always be way behind everyone else, but if I don't do anything, I'll only keep falling further and further behind. I wish I had the drive and energy and decided that I must live, I cannot die and would improve myself starting now! One thing is that you guys don't know all the details and factors of my life, so maybe if you did, you may say that I really should kill myself.