I feel there is nothing to look forward to. I am unemployed for almost a year now, I haven't had a boyfriend for 7 years and now I've been rejected by a university which would have been a great thing. I don't know what to do, nothing seems to work out. I feel that everything I start will only end in failure and I don't see the reason to live for. I have a loving family, but I feel that no one loves me and I hate myself for this and that time after time I just want to leave everything and die, however I'm too afraid to kill myself, but I feel that would be the best thing to do for everyone, so no one has to listen to my yammering.