Is there only one soulmate in this life or do you get more than one chance?

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by shamps, Apr 24, 2010.

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  1. shamps

    shamps Well-Known Member

    So whats your stance on this?

    Do you think there is truly only one person for each of us in this life or do we have more than one shot??????
  2. ASolitaryBlue

    ASolitaryBlue Well-Known Member

    depends on how you view human nature, i think. depends on how you define someone. is it by their personality? their physical body? their soul (assuming we have one)?

    from one point of view, who we are as a person changes. who we are is based upon our personality or something non-physical but changing. our human nature, who we are is not constant. we may have the same body but not be the same person we were 5 years ago, we may not be the same person as yesterday, even. in this case, the idea that there is only one person out there for us to be with, one true "soul mate," is ridiculous, simply bc everyone changes. you might find a soul mate and a few years later you are both different people, and bc of this, you no longer feel the same way, and are no longer able to be together. but you may then find someone else perfectly compatible with the new, albeit temporary you. so this also makes marriage, with its eternal vows, silly and not realistic.

    from another perspective, if you believe that who we are comes from our soul, which is unchanging and eternal, then yes, i suppose the idea of one true soul mate makes sense. if we stay the same person, and everyone else does too, there should on,y be one person perfectly compatible with you. this idea would also give credibility back to the concept of marriage.

    and if you believe that the body physically the source of who we are, well, i wont get into that here and now.

    for me, im more with the idea that our personality depends upon not a soul, and not just the shell of our bodies, but some mixture of how our brain works, genes, that sort of thing. maybe an immaterial "mind" if i could find a way to make its existence plausible. so i dont think we can have an unchanging personality and therefore we would have to have more than one chance at finding a "soul mate"

    sorry for the drawn out philosophical answer... im a philosophy minor and this is a topic we just spent a lot of time on in class...
  3. shamps

    shamps Well-Known Member

    Thanks Liz,
    That made for interesting reading and can say that ive never thought of it like that.I have always thought that me and my now "ex" were meant to be together and I think thats why im struggling so much to accept its over even though he has tret me so badly,im a very forgiving person.However the past few days have led me to slightly doubt this as I think if he was a soulmate then surely he wouldve realised it too and not left me for another woman.
    I dunno,im all at 6's and 7's.Maybe its the fear of possibly spending this horrible life alone and never finding it again that I keep holding onto the memory of us.Im not by any means a brainy woman but thats the best way I can describe how im feeling.......x
  4. plates

    plates Well-Known Member

    would it be so immaterial if you think it's brain chemistry and genetics?

    loads of people would be other's soulmates if they got in touch with their spirit and life. personally, i don't think many people maybe their make connections based on appearance, image buying, career stuff, "personal development" and things like that, find they don't know what they are saying/doing and lost with their life ...and then they find OMG i need a spiritual advisor or something, and shell out tons to go consult a therapist in hampstead to find their spirit or some other bullshit, when it all comes naturally to me. all you need to do is breathe and yell and scream :dunno: and say what you really mean. :cat:
  5. DreamReaver

    DreamReaver Well-Known Member

    To me a soul mate is the ability to completely love someone that you have no idea why you love them, they can't do no wrong everything is right about them, even though you know no one is perfect, they are perfect. They are your soulmate. You have no reason to love them but you do anyway. YOu would do anythign and everything for them. True Love?

    I found my soulmate, shame, she is not my soulmate, she doesn't even want to talk to me. We are apparently still "friends". I never wanted to fall in love with her, never asked for it, it just happened. My love for her is unexplainable, but it is real and has been for the past 10 years.

    She is my soulmate, i am just not hers.
  6. necrodude

    necrodude Well-Known Member

    no such thing. never believed it, started to, hope destroyed.
  7. Perfect Melancholy

    Perfect Melancholy SF Friend

    WE have more then one shot there are people that come in to our lives and we think wow there amazing, always seek that connection whatever your beliefs and do not doubt your ability to make someone smile
  8. Daphna

    Daphna Well-Known Member

    I believe we all have as many soulmates as needed. For me it is my husband now, but if he were to die in the future and I meet somone else then I was meant for two. So I guess it is all up to Yahweh of whom I believe in for me. Hope this helps. Sending you a :hug: :)
  9. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    I think people too often get confused with what a soulmate is. Many people think that a soulmate is someone you're in love with and want to spend the rest of your life with and who understands you, etc., etc., but I disagree. That's someone you love, not a neccesarily a soulmate.

    Another misconception people seem to often get from this soulmate business is that your soulmate is human. Wrong. I had a soulmate, and she was an animal. I didn't want to marry her or live the rest of my life in her arms or whatever gooey stuff people claim they feel for their 'soulmates', our souls simply connected and understood one another.. I can't explain it entirely, we could understand eachother with just a look or a thought. Maybe it sounds silly to other people, but I believe in it.

    If you think about it, why should humans be the only ones with souls? When we die and we go on to become ghosts (if you believe in that) or become reincarnated.. our souls moving on.. if that can happen with us humans, whos to say it can't happen with animals or insects? There are probably thousands of little ghost spiders running around your homes, but people don't think about that, they only think about humans. Why? Every living thing has a soul, even animals so why can't animals be our soulmates too? It angers me sometimes how people only ever consider other humans in terms of their search for a soulmate, while humans probably have the ugliest, most complicated souls of all.
  10. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    I'm one for open relationships. :yes: So no "soulmate" for me. I don't believe in it.

    Just my opinion. Other people's can differ and I'm cool with that. :yes:
  11. bluewail

    bluewail Well-Known Member

    i kinda agree with avarice, a soulmate is different from someone you're in love with. and you can have as many soulmates as you like, because your "soul" can connect with anyone. and as for people you're in love with, i think there can be more than one of those too, but they'll be different. so if you find an amazing connection with someone, i think you can find another amazing connection with someone else, but it won't necessarily be the same.
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