Is this dissociation?

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by feathers, Dec 7, 2010.

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  1. feathers

    feathers Well-Known Member

    I experience a mood where I am very distant from the world and myself. I describe it as my 'disconnected' state. I wrote this whilst I was in it:

    "Disconnected. That's how I feel at the minute. Nonchalant. Spaced out. Distant, from my emotions and from the world. My head feels muddled up. I can't think straight. I don't know what I'm thinking or how I feel, there is nothing other than the crap I'm spilling out now.
    I try to ask myself how I feel, but I can't even ask because there is a block or something stopping the thought from entering my consciousness. Everything's foggy.
    What's going on? I can't ask myself that either. But what I do understand is that I feel no pain. B (what I call my suicidal state) is very much in touch with the pain and feels it constantly. A (my normal state) feels the pain but her positivity can temporarily block it out at times. This state can barely remember what I was upset about. I know there was something. There is still pain and stress. I feel it in my best, but it feels numb.
    Maybe this is the true madness. I can't take any more of my own emotions, so I disconnect myself from the reality of them."

    Is this dissociation? Thanks in advance for replies.

    K x
  2. TBear

    TBear Antiquities Friend

    Sounds like me when I disconnect - it is a weird eerie feeling, a defense against pain.

    somehow freeing from the intensity of feelings...

    My therapist calls it dissociation - yeah

    Leaves me a bit disoriented at times.

    Take Care
  3. Socialman

    Socialman Well-Known Member

    I had it two days ago. I should have felt something when people were being mean to me, but I didn't. I didn't mind anything. I knew what I should have thought, but nothing would snap me back into feeling emotions. The next day when I could feel again. That is when I noticed the pain.
  4. feathers

    feathers Well-Known Member

    Sounds like it. I felt really bad a few weeks ago and I voluntarily dissociated so that I could block out bad past memories.
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