is this mean?

Discussion in 'Soap Box' started by soliloquise, Dec 31, 2008.

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  1. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    to find some of the blagging on here annoying? there are some on here who genuinely need help and others who are on a total attention trip. how do you personally tell the difference and how do you deal. someone in chat just said they took 800 pills once.... um lol
    am i cruel? how do you deal
     
  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    It can sometimes be annoying when you know for certain what is being said is not the truth. I guess I look at it that these people need help as well or they would not be trying to draw attention to themselves with their dramatic stories. What really bothers me though is when they feel they need the attention over someone that is truly in a crisis situation. You do learn to weigh things very carefully before you react or take any kind of action. Sometimes you become more critical. I guess it can become a little bit like triage in a hospital. You learn to assess and decide which needs the most care and concentrate there, but also making certain the others remain somewhat stable. You aren't being cruel, but rather safeguarding your own emotional stability.
     
  3. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    It can sometimes be annoying when you know for certain what is being said is not the truth. I guess I look at it that these people need help as well or they would not be trying to draw attention to themselves with their dramatic stories. What really bothers me though is when they feel they need the attention over someone that is truly in a crisis situation. You do learn to weigh things very carefully before you react or take any kind of action. Sometimes you become more critical. I guess it can become a little bit like triage in a hospital. You learn to assess and decide which needs the most care and concentrate there, but also making certain the others remain somewhat stable. You aren't being cruel, but rather safeguarding your own emotional stability.


    thanks for replying. i think that was what i was trying to say.. the attention seeking people and the people who come in for desperate help. in the same chatroom.. sometimes there seem to be those who join in and it is obviously crap...and it becomes a competition of ridiculousness, whist the poor bugger needing help feels talked over and disguarded. i have just bitten my lip and tried to focus on the one who really needs the help but it is v hard not to say something. the same with people who post that their arm is hanging off but can still type lol... i guess i felt guilty for thinking that
     
  4. fromthatshow

    fromthatshow Staff Alumni

    I don't think there's anything wrong with attention seeking, but I suppose you can go about it in the wrong ways, and from many maybe it is not sincere.
     
  5. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    When its obvious that their story doesn't add up it is annoying. In general I try to help everyone even if it appears they are seeking attention. We all need attention sometimes :) and no you're not cruel at all :hug:
     
  6. hellwithhugewounds

    hellwithhugewounds Well-Known Member

    I personally think we're all here because we need attention. After all, if we got the attention we need in real life this forum would be a lot more empty. It's just that we go about it in different ways, but it always ends up being because we need to fill an emotional and mental hole. Both those who exaggerate and those who don't. When our motive on this forum is the same, the action we use to fulfill that motive I feel is understandable and tolerable to a greater degree than the real world, where everyone's motives are different and not always this pure. Even if it appears selfish of them to hinder your efforts to help others by getting all the attention, selfishness just means they feel they need help more than anyone else, or they feel like they really need some comic relief to help, not serious discussion. Both ways, same pure motive.

    But of course you're not mean. Your motive is just as pure. :)
     
  7. levitated-one

    levitated-one Well-Known Member

    I think people should give and take.. give attentions, and take them too. Both are equally necessary.
     

  8. Good point.
     
  9. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Well, some people may have a genuine reason for doing such things whilst others have a not soo benevolent reason for making things up.

    Also since this is a support forum, this kind of thing is bound to happen. To add to that, this forum hosts an international array of members, so you are also bound to meet a wide range of people.
     
  10. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    thanks all for replying , all valid points ta...
     
  11. Rosenrot

    Rosenrot Forum Buddy

    Eh, I can never tell. It does seem strange that so many people somehow disappear but their friends somehow go on their account and talk exactly like they do and post for them... not to mention the people who say they've attempted suicide 100+ times... but hey, who am I to judge? If someone needs help, I'm willing to give it.

    I don't think at all you're mean for feeling that way. If you feel someone is just out for attention and it bothers you, simply ignore the topic. No harm can be done that way.
     
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